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Best countries for buying a wife

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Re: Best countries for buying a wife

Postby blukatzen » Fri 30 Jan 2009, 22:22:19

$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('Ludi', 'N')o, he meant Heineken shouldn't have to put up with women playing mind/emotion games.

Not that he should give up!


With THAT I concur wholeheartedly! I hope all goes well for him and the *proper* lady should be found!

Don't loose hope and when you do, the ladies on this board will talk with ya, and hopefully, be your best 'sounding board". We care!

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Re: Best countries for buying a wife

Postby Ferretlover » Fri 30 Jan 2009, 23:51:11

$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('Ludi', 'N')o, he meant Heineken shouldn't have to put up with women playing mind/emotion games.

No man or woman should have to put up with that!
$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('blukatzen', '[')Don't loose hope and when you do, the ladies on this board will talk with ya, and hopefully, be your best 'sounding board".

Yes, indeed. The PO.com Ladies Auxiliary is a force to be reckoned with! :lol:
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Re: Best countries for buying a wife

Postby hardtootell » Sat 31 Jan 2009, 01:50:35

Here's my opinion- for what its worth. I agree that American women may not be worth the effort and have ridiculous expectations and are generally selfish and self centered.

If it were me, the first country I'd head for would be the Ukraine. I'd also consider, the UK and Iceland- might get better value there :) Please blog your adventures somewhere. It would make great reading!
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Re: Best countries for buying a wife

Postby mercurygirl » Sat 31 Jan 2009, 02:04:42

$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('hardtootell', 'I') agree that American women may not be worth the effort and have ridiculous expectations and are generally selfish and self centered.


What a f*cked up statement.
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Re: Best countries for buying a wife

Postby Tanada » Sat 31 Jan 2009, 08:58:56

$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('mercurygirl', '')$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('hardtootell', 'I') agree that American women may not be worth the effort and have ridiculous expectations and are generally selfish and self centered.
What a f*cked up statement.

Take the word women out of that sentance and tell me it isn't true.
$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('hardtootell', 'I') agree that American's [s]women[/s] may not be worth the effort and have ridiculous expectations and are generally selfish and self centered.

Americans are on an individual basis often petty and selfish, and I include myself in that. Look, I have been married twice and both of my wives divorced me because they became dissillusioned. Turns out I was neither Don Juan nor Bill Gates. But in the first blush of Love they thought they could remake me into what they wanted, and when it didn't happen they decided to move on anf find it somewhere else. Not everyone is willing to follow the advice I gave my second wife when she asked me why I wanted to keep working on our marriage. When I was a kid I adopted a personal philosophy based on this song, and for the most part I have tried to live by it because in my life at least it works. The thing is, being negative is easy and being positive for most people takes an mental effort.

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Made weak by time and fate, but strong in will
To strive, to seek, to find, and not to yield.
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Re: Best countries for buying a wife

Postby mos6507 » Sat 31 Jan 2009, 10:24:13

$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('JRP3', 'E')mailing someone daily can reveal much about them, maybe a lot more than awkward face to face interactions where everyone is worried about making a good impression.

I disagree. People role-play when they are pen-pals without even knowing it. They have all the time in the world to write their messages and they fill in the blanks in their image of the other person with their fantasies. It doesn't indicate how people will get along in real life.

I once had a pen and paper penpal. We wrote back and forth every single day (with the latency to deal with) and then finally I got her on the phone and it was completely awkward and pointless. Whatever we had only ever worked in words.

So if you have a penpal, all it tells you is that it works as a penpal. It could be a total disaster in real life.
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Re: Best countries for buying a wife

Postby Aaron » Sat 31 Jan 2009, 11:09:08

Want to find a mate?

Stop looking.

Live your life... get out there... have fun... the things you like to do will bring you in contact with people who share your interests.

If you approach this with an agenda, you will find an agenda-based relationship.
The problem is, of course, that not only is economics bankrupt, but it has always been nothing more than politics in disguise... economics is a form of brain damage.

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Re: Best countries for buying a wife

Postby WildRose » Sat 31 Jan 2009, 11:15:58

$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('Aaron', 'W')ant to find a mate?

Stop looking.

Live your life... get out there... have fun... the things you like to do will bring you in contact with people who share your interests.

If you approach this with an agenda, you will find an agenda-based relationship.


Excellent advice.
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Re: Best countries for buying a wife

Postby Ludi » Sat 31 Jan 2009, 12:08:02

Maybe join some clubs and things in your area. :)
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Re: Best countries for buying a wife

Postby mos6507 » Sat 31 Jan 2009, 12:20:35

$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('Ludi', 'M')aybe join some clubs and things in your area. :)


But then there would be less time for peakoil.com. We can't have that. ;)
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Re: Best countries for buying a wife

Postby Heineken » Sat 31 Jan 2009, 13:18:15

$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('outcast', '')$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('', '
')The question you raise is a chicken-or-egg one. Which comes first?

I feel that many of the difficulties between the sexes derive from the social breakdown that modern civilization has promoted.



You're problem seems to be you want them to be docile and submissive to your every whim, which is really so 19th century. You have once again proven why their mistrust of men is justified.


You have no idea of what I want, or who I am.
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Re: Best countries for buying a wife

Postby Heineken » Sat 31 Jan 2009, 13:27:51

$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('Aaron', 'W')ant to find a mate?

Stop looking.

Live your life... get out there... have fun... the things you like to do will bring you in contact with people who share your interests.

If you approach this with an agenda, you will find an agenda-based relationship.


Aaron (and this responds to Ludi and WildRose as well), this is healthy advice, but it's less practical than meets the eye, at least in my case.

I've tried a little volunteer work, and for the past five weeks I've been going to a Unitarian church. No luck so far.

Remember too that I'm in a rather isolated rural area. There are few social opportunities here.

I don't do well in competitive social groups, in general. In such groups I've found that most of the women tend to be already married or in relationships. There may be a few single women but most of them are unattractive (overweight, look like they haven't slept in three years, etc.).

Out in public I don't discern any interest of women in me. They're preoccupied with whatever they're doing. I'm trying to be friendlier and more open in my interactions with strangers.

However, the way it works, the good ones are too often already "taken."

I'm not physically attracted to women I consider unattractive. That's a real limitation that is me-specific.

At this point I have to consider more radical, surgical approaches.
"Actually, humans died out long ago."
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Re: Best countries for buying a wife

Postby Ludi » Sat 31 Jan 2009, 14:06:45

I would have the same problems, H. I was fortunate to meet my husband when we were employed at the same shop. But I never dated to speak of. For the unsocial hermits, it's darn hard to find anyone compatible. :cry:
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Re: Best countries for buying a wife

Postby Plantagenet » Sat 31 Jan 2009, 14:19:58

Women are glorious bits of magic light in our dark universe. We are lucky to even be allowed to be near them, luckier still to even catch a glimpse of their evanescent beauty. 8)
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Re: Best countries for buying a wife

Postby Byron100 » Sat 31 Jan 2009, 15:06:39

Just a couple extra thoughts...

I'm a bit concerned about the speed of your "searching" versus having a period of recovery from your previous relationship. Might it be better to just have a period (3-6 months, perhaps?) "to yourself" before launching yourself into a new relationship? And it goes without saying that being single is better (often far better) than being in a undesirable relationship.

My advice is to keep away from the personals and dating sites for now, and just concentrate on de-isolating yourself by making / meeting new friends, participating on different forums such as this one, etc. Allow things to happen organically, as that greatly improves your odds of having a successful relationship in the long run.

Perhaps it's just me, but going at this with a "surgical" approach doesn't sound all that appealing in regards to finding a good companion for yourself.
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Re: Best countries for buying a wife

Postby mercurygirl » Sat 31 Jan 2009, 15:31:27

$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('Tanada', '')$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('mercurygirl', '')$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('hardtootell', 'I') agree that American women may not be worth the effort and have ridiculous expectations and are generally selfish and self centered.
What a f*cked up statement.

Take the word women out of that sentance and tell me it isn't true.
Take the words American women out, and insert "people".
But one can't go around thinking that way if one wants to have a social life or a mate.

There are lots of good points here. Even Plantagenet thinks he's joking, but there's a bit of truth there. Perhaps a little contemplation of the eternal Feminine is in order. Read some female-based lit, look at Art, in general invite the female into your life.

Maybe "stop looking" is a good idea in that respect. Find out what you're looking FOR. Then give thanks for it. Give thanks for kind, honest, industrious, women who like to have hot sex. Or whatever your parameters are.
Too "The Secret-ish"? Maybe. Can't hurt, might help!
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Re: Best countries for buying a wife

Postby Auntie_Cipation » Sat 31 Jan 2009, 16:17:02

$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('Aaron', 'W')ant to find a mate?

Stop looking.

Live your life... get out there... have fun... the things you like to do will bring you in contact with people who share your interests.

If you approach this with an agenda, you will find an agenda-based relationship.


I agree with this advice in concept, meaning that it's a good attitude to have to just proceed with the life one wants to live, and see who comes into it.

But, like Heineken and Ludi, it wouldn't be practical for me. I live in a community of under 2000 people, most of whom hold views or live lives that are in direct conflict with my own values, meaning I would never even consider a relationship with them.

There is of course a subset of the community that I enjoy and relate to (otherwise I wouldn't find this such a good place to live, obviously) but they are mostly all partnered up already or have other circumstances that make them unappealing to me (alcohol problems, etc). Now add to the equation the fact that I am looking for a particular kind of life (ie, peak oil aware, homestead-y) and that again rules out most of whoever's left. I could probably count on my fingers the number of people in my community who I could be truly compatible with. And it's entirely possible that the number is zero.

But still, this is the *kind* of community I do want to live in. So how to know which of the communities of this kind I should be in, in order to find the needle in the haystack? Or should I move to the city, a place I *know* I don't want to live, just to increase the number of people I'm in proximity to? No thanks!

So, given all that, the online networks are not a bad idea. Especially if you can find one that's somewhat filtered, aimed at people you already have some major commonalities with. (Such as, for example, if po.com had a singles forum...)

One of my perennial questions: "How does a hermit find another hermit?"
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Re: Best countries for buying a wife

Postby Quinny » Sat 31 Jan 2009, 16:32:51

Sorry H but Aaron's advice is spot on. You'll only get what you want when you stop looking.

Only other advice is very shallow, but it tends to work. Be direct and up front and just ask every woman you fancy to sleep with you. I don't mean chat them up, just say that you find them attractive and you'd like to sleep with them (in what ever way you feel comfortable).

In my experience you get a hit rate of at least 50%!

$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('Heineken', '')$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('Aaron', 'W')ant to find a mate?

Stop looking.

Live your life... get out there... have fun... the things you like to do will bring you in contact with people who share your interests.

If you approach this with an agenda, you will find an agenda-based relationship.


Aaron (and this responds to Ludi and WildRose as well), this is healthy advice, but it's less practical than meets the eye, at least in my case.

I've tried a little volunteer work, and for the past five weeks I've been going to a Unitarian church. No luck so far.

Remember too that I'm in a rather isolated rural area. There are few social opportunities here.

I don't do well in competitive social groups, in general. In such groups I've found that most of the women tend to be already married or in relationships. There may be a few single women but most of them are unattractive (overweight, look like they haven't slept in three years, etc.).

Out in public I don't discern any interest of women in me. They're preoccupied with whatever they're doing. I'm trying to be friendlier and more open in my interactions with strangers.

However, the way it works, the good ones are too often already "taken."

I'm not physically attracted to women I consider unattractive. That's a real limitation that is me-specific.

At this point I have to consider more radical, surgical approaches.
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Re: Best countries for buying a wife

Postby Heineken » Sat 31 Jan 2009, 18:37:27

$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('Quinny', 'S')orry H but Aaron's advice is spot on. You'll only get what you want when you stop looking.


Well this gets into the area of philosophy, religion, metaphysics.

If I stop looking I will meet absolutely no one. That's how it works, in my experience.

What you get is proportional to the effort expended.

Granted, I could still end up with nothing.

The thing to do with Aaron's advice is to segue from not looking into not wanting. That begins to attract my interest.

Byron: I agree I shouldn't push too hard at this point. I'm still very wounded. I feel myself close to tears at times. My eyes water but nothing drops out of them.
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Re: Best countries for buying a wife

Postby PenultimateManStanding » Sat 31 Jan 2009, 19:06:45

$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('Heineken', '
') I feel myself close to tears at times. My eyes water but nothing drops out of them.
John Updike wrote a lot about relationships. His death is in the news. He wrote a poem about his pending death in which he referred to 'a shrug and tearless eyes.' You are an interesting character, Heineken. Physically imposing, handsome and, yes, you do look a lot younger than your years. But you seem so fragile in your posts. Perhaps love would give you strength. I was in love once and painted the best painting I ever did. Out of love and the quality faded. The British painter John Constable did all of his great work before his beloved wife died, after which he faded. Love is risk and love is glory. Those tears may form and fall.

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