by blukatzen » Tue 23 Jan 2007, 14:47:56
$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('Pretorian', 'N')o I am not suicidal at all and I think its the silliest thing to do, but, how to explain.. I'm not afraid of death and I dont really care very much about having a life-threatening situation. In fact I miss having some risk factor in my life. I used to travel a lot, getting and loosing a bunch of different jobs, having certain hopes and goals in my life and now its all gone. I am better than ever financially but I'm stuck with job I hate which is also completely unsecure, constant arguments with my wife, lack of any exitement and all that in a small grey town in the middle of nowhere of an unfun state, with a good perspective of spending the rest of my life here just becouse my in-laws live nearby .
I am just dying every day a little by little hoping for some changes, for a few drops of freedom or whatever..
Thank you very much SPG for answering..
Sounds to me like you should
1. First, define what is "fun" to you. Then set perimeters. Define what you WILL accept and what you won't. Stick to this.
2. If there is no hope of a peaceful fulfilling relationship, get a divorce, and move out. Make plans to support your children, if there are any. They should not have to "pay" for your decisions, and neither should society.
That said, moving on with your life, if it fits into the perimeters YOU set in #1, will get you towards your goals much quicker. Sometimes being with the wrong partner is suicidal in itself. I am glad that I got out of a bad first marriage myself, and am very happy in my second marriage that DOES "fit". And even if I did stay single, I still would have been happier than being in that first marriage. Why go thru life wearing the left shoe on the right foot?
You will just stay in misery and KEEP YOURSELF from being in the pro-active situation you need to BE IN. Getting OUT of it quicker means getting TO the place you need to in.
The idea of "marriage" does not work for some people either. You maybe one of the people who are best alone, and mobile. That does not mean you can't have fulfilling relationships, it means that you may not be able or want to be in a place to "commit" to being IN that place for a lifetime. Or maybe you have to find another wanderer who has similar perimeters that you do, and would make a perfect "fit". (however rare that is). If you DO find someone like that, treasure them, for they are a jewel!
3. Based on #1, get a new job/career that you WILL be happy in. Period. Train for it now if you must re-invent yourself into that career. Best idea is to make your new career/job that will not get sourced out of the N. American marketplace, and will support your dreams and financial obligations and at least be PeakOil friendly.
4. Good luck with setting your perimeters, taking actions, and living your life. Live DELIBERATELY!