by Dreamtwister » Fri 13 Feb 2009, 15:41:42
$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('nobodypanic', 'w')e need a thread on how to
become a pirate.

It's not that hard...
1) Find a ship. Make sure it's fast. Check the classified ads. Some good ones can be had for about the price of a new car. Buying is good, but don't overlook an opportunity. Stealing one, or better yet, devising an insurance scam with the owner could lower the entrance cost.
2) Get a crew. Family, neighbors, unemployed fishermen all make good choices. That stupid cousin that once turned you in for smoking pot is probably not a good choice for first mate, though. Use some common sense.
3) Get some weapons. RPG-7's and AK-47's are the popular choices for obvious reasons, but don't limit yourself. In a pinch, a good .308 and some revolvers will do.
4) Bribe some coast guard officials. I Can't stress this one enough. Nothing ruins a pirate's day quite like having their hard-stolen booty stolen by the coast guard.
5) Stay within your weight class. Don't start out by trying to take down a shipment of oil or Russian tanks. Remember, this is a new business venture, you should start small and work your way up.
6) Repeat business is key. If you over-harvest, or frequently kill your captured crews, the shipping companies might reroute, or stop shipping altogether. Don't get greedy.
7) SPREAD THE WEALTH. Remember that your community is your camoflauge. Treat them well, and they will do the same.
Edit: Wow, I'm bored!
The whole of human history is a refutation by experiment of the concept of "moral world order". - Friedrich Nietzsche