[Sixstrings]

This has been on my mind lately. A few weeks ago, a guy approached me in a dark parking lot and stated he was homeless with nowhere to go, and started asking for money. This was at the moment where I was unlocking my car and putting groceries in, so being streetwise I'm well aware that I was vulnerable to carjacking or attempted mugging.

I almost always just say "man, I'm flat broke, sorry" because it's never worth the risk of getting up close to somebody desperate for money. If the person is sitting down while begging and clearly isn't a threat, then I have bought them some sandwiches and water a couple times. But when they're walking up to you whether it's a dark parking lot or not, it's just not worth the risk of getting mixed up in either violence or craziness.

So anyway I nicely gave him my standard line that I don't have any money on me. And then he kept approaching, at which point I stepped back from my car and yelled at him to get away from me. He seemed surprised and actually scared of me, and quickly walked away without further incident. Thinking about this later, I'm pretty sure he wasn't going to try to carjack or mug me. He didn't look like the thug type, he looked pretty normal except for having a big backpack on.

And then it occurred to me that if this guy was telling the truth and was homeless, in my area there really is nowhere for him to go. My county has one shelter, but people are limited to three nights a week and the other four must be spent on the street. The very rich and populous county south of me is even worse, they don't have a homeless shelter. They also have ordinances against sleeping in public, and they don't allow tent camps to last long. I guess the message is, if you're homeless you just need to hoof it to a kinder city.

But there's a limit to how much you can just export your homeless problem, and this is why we really do need a social safety net in every community. We need shelters for the homeless, because it's just too dangerous for individuals to engage in one-on-one charity. Even if you're a right wing republican, you should be in favor of public shelters if for no other reason than so you're not bothered on the street.

So what do you do? Do you never assist panhandlers, or like me are there some situations where you'll give some help?

[Ludi]

Yes, I help panhandlers whenever I can.

[hardtootell-2]

Wow- good question and I can relate to your parking lot experience. I don't blame you for yelling. I would have done the same. Once the guy backed off, I might have spoken to him more quietly and offered him something.

I have been in a lot of similar situations esp when I was traveling in India and Nepal. I have had to strike people in my own defense and it was not always clear that I was in danger. I pushed a pickpocket in San Fran into traffic. He insisted that he had done nothing, of course.

Homeless folks can have mental illness and the associated bad judgment. They may lack the self awareness that they appear threatening. If you are like me you are hard wired to err on the side of split second over reaction when in doubt about personal safety. If I see that I am making a person (esp a woman) uneasy on the street, I cross and walk the other way, as a courtesy.

I am hyper alert at night (and look it), when I have things in my hands or I am in an unfamiliar place.

2 cents

[Revi]

I help the homeless, but I agree with you on the approach in the dark parking lot thing.

We have to have some situational awareness.

[Sixstrings]

$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('hardtootell-2', 'I') have been in a lot of similar situations esp when I was traveling in India and Nepal. I have had to strike people in my own defense and it was not always clear that I was in danger. I pushed a pickpocket in San Fran into traffic. He insisted that he had done nothing, of course.

[WildRose]

There are a lot of panhandlers in Edmonton, Alberta - downtown, the Whyte Avenue area, in parking lots of all major grocery chains, and even at busy intersections - they stand on the grass divider between the lanes and hold signs asking for help. I've been approached many times in parking lots while getting my groceries in the car , and I've given money many times but not more than $5 at a time. I find that I have to make a judgment call about the person and situation every time, whether I'm safe, what I think the person will do with the money. Once I was approached by a young guy in a covered parking lot and there was no one else around - I did not help this person as I realized how vulnerable I would be pulling out my wallet right then and there. I tend to not help people who ask along Whyte Avenue or downtown, because if you help one you soon have several following behind. I can see the need some people have - they truly are hungry and just want the next meal - but I have been wary of some that are, well, wild-eyed and I hate the thought of giving to someone who would use the money for a fix.

There is a great need for more affordable housing in this city, and also for more mental health services - both would go a long way in aiding these people. I'm sure there are some who just don't want to work, though.

[GoghGoner]

Giving money to homeless people is strongly NOT recommended. Give money to a shelter instead.

[Ludi]

Lately I've only seen older men of the road, and give them money at intersections when I pass them in my car. There seem to be more of them passing through the town. If they want to buy a drink with the money, that's ok with me. It's been a couple decades since I was approached by a panhandler when I was on foot. But I don't spend much time in the city.

It's quite easy for me to imagine myself as a homeless person, but I would not have lived long as one.

[dinopello]

We have a few "regulars" that hang out on benches or you see when walking around, some of these have shopping carts. One often asks me if I have a cigarette (if I had one, I'd probably give it to him). I did give one of the guys with the shopping carts a dollar once because I saw him pick up a discarded styrofoam take-out food container and put it in the trash, but usually I do not give out money on the street.

[MD]

$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('GoghGoner', 'G')iving money to homeless people is strongly NOT recommended. Give money to a shelter instead.

[AAA]

I very rarely if ever give money to people. What I used to do was carry $10 gift cards from McDonalds.

I haven't seen a panhandler/homeless person in months.

[Pretorian]

i had, as some would call it, a rough trot for a few months when i was borderline homeless and ate no more than 3 or 4 light meals a week, often less. I had never asked anyone for a penny though I had some friends that could borrow me enough to buy food ( which was dirt-cheap overthere). I didnt borrow because paying them back would have changed cardinally my plans and those were basically all that I had left in my life. On the other hand, I had various people, even strangers, wanting to feed me or who were offering me money (significant amounts for me at the time ). Again, I had not asked anyone for anything. I guess, at some point the need is visible for those who wants to see.
And years before this , I lived on about $7-8 a month, and had relatives that dealt with mch less.
So, panhandlers do not just annoy me. They enfuriate me. "I only get $500 a month!" one Negro told me in DC. "Do you have a dollar?/couple of dollars/ets" If the question positioned this way, my line: " I do, but, ehh..thanks for asking anyway"

[TreebeardsUncle]

HI.
I frequently give to homeless folks both while driving and on foot.
Generally I give them $1 (which is so little I hardly notice and enough to help them out a bit). I generally just give to 1 or two folks at a time and avoid groups and try to avoid being seen to give much when more than a couple homeless vagrants types are around. I have given significantly more to people who have run out of gas, anwhere from $2 or $3 to even $10 or more.

Geoff

[TreebeardsUncle]

I should give a little more information about why I can afford to do this. Although I am only 5 6 and weigh around 160 pounds, I am 39 years old and quite strong and fast and feel confident that I could handle a couple of guys if need be (as long as certain weapons were not involved). Also have plenty of money.

g

[MarkJ]

I've donated food, beverages, bus tickets, taxi fare and train tickets to the homeless and very low income residents, but not cash since they'll use the cash to buy cigarettes, beer, liquor, drugs, scratch-offs etc.

In addition, when you donate anything of value, they'll sell it to buy cigarettes, beer, liquor or drugs and/or you'll make them a target for theft, assault etc.

For example, when a friend donated a bike to a homeless guy, another homeless guy beat the crap out of him, stole the bike, then sold it to buy cigarettes and beer.


We tend to steer homeless residents to urban regions with more homeless shelters, soup kitchens, food banks, welfare motels, public housing projects, rooms for rent and more private landlords that accept Section 8 tenants, or tenants without security, last months rent, references etc.

The best thing we can do for many of them is to give them transportation assistance to move to an area with a warmer year round climate, a lower cost of living and more safety net support systems.

[Roy]

Occasionally. Depends on the context. Like you, I am always aware of my surroundings. If I feel the least bit uncomfortable I say no and move away quickly.

I trust my instincts in those situations. So far they've not failed me.

[shortonsense]

$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('Sixstrings', '
')So what do you do? Do you never assist panhandlers, or like me are there some situations where you'll give some help?

[JJ]

I lived on the street (mostly by choice) from 1976-1985.

I used to panhandle before panhandling was "cool".

Sometime we got 200-300 dollars a day. Plus tons of food.

we had a joke, don't waste money on food. Food was too easy to get.

saw many, many killings. Its a very, very violent lifestyle.

I don't see any panhandlers where I live, but when I go to Austin, i see a lot. I always think, man, you got to the party late...

[obixman]

I used to park at a lot behind Charity hospital in New Orleans, and almost always helped anyone who asked. The hospital simply patched 'em up and put them back on the streets. Now I'm in Houston and am much more selective, although I do honor honesty - the person who recieved the most simply had a sign that read "Why lie, I need a drink."

Still, if I'm feeling a bit flush and have the time, I do try to help.

[Maddog78]

Sometimes, not often.
I usually tell them no.

The only scary experience I had was in Amsterdam one night walking down a relatively busy street, not some back alley and this guy sitting against a wall asked for some money.
I flipped him a few small coins, didn't even really look at what I gave him and just kept walking. I heard footsteps pounding up behind me and instantly he was in my face screaming at me. "I'm out here fucking starving" etc. The guy was huge, probably about 6' 6"
For a brief moment I thought about being confrontational back to see if he would back off, since I'm around 6 ft. myself and have been through some real battles in my younger days
but I didn't. I gave him a couple guilders, which wasn't really that much but he seemed satisfied and left me.
I was pissed off with myself for letting him intimidate me and it bothered me for awhile but I suppose that really was the smart thing to do.