[Wednesday]

My husband and I have been separated for a year and a half and are currently going through a divorce.

I left my cozy rural doomstead in Canada when my marriage fell apart and had to move back to Houston, Texas which is my hometown. I've been back in Texas for 18 months and I still haven't figured out how to deal with PO.

I am comfortable in both urban and small town lifestyles and I can travel back and forth between the two with ease. Having said that, I have never really been tested like I would be in a rural farming situation.

I have had one relationship since my marriage fell apart, and now that too has ended. One of the contributing factors in the failure of this most recent romance, was my concern over what I saw as his extreme materialism.

I'm not the kind of girl you can take to the mall. I just have no use for shopping. When I shop, I know exactly what I am going for, I find my item and I am in and out.

He thought I was a total freaky weirdo. His favorite way to spend a Saturday was at the flippin' mall. As our relationship progressed, I became aware that he was unwilling to even consider that this lifestyle he craves might not be possible in a few short years. Recession? What recession? He just didn't want to see it.

I would explain my desire for what I called "the simple life" when discussing my desire to continue my plans to get the hell out of Dodge. I never directly spoke about Peak Oil, climate change or any thing that could require a tin foil hat. I was very careful to simply express a desire for the "simple life".

I thought I was winning him over, but it's really a moot point now that this relationship has also failed.

I am going to do it alone, it seems.

I'm not made of money, so I have to be clever. I'm also stuck in the Houston area for now, because my job is here.

I'll be honest, I'm scared.

I was pretty confident when I was living high up in the Canadian Rockies, but urban Houston scares the crap out of me.

I don't know where to begin. I just know I have to do this by myself. My soon to be ex-husband was the single biggest financial disaster of my life. It's a myth that women win in a divorce. I have done nothing but lose my financial security ever since I met my husband. The new guy was just as bad. I am not about to make that mistake again.

I've been looking at property in the Texas hill country, but I cant afford it. I look at properties I can afford and they just are not very desirable for my purpose.

What does a single woman on a budget do first?

[vision-master]

Get your hair and nails done?

[shortonsense]

$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('Wednesday', '
')What does a single woman on a budget do first?

[Ludi]

$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('Wednesday', '
')I've been looking at property in the Texas hill country, but I cant afford it. I look at properties I can afford and they just are not very desirable for my purpose.

[dinopello]

We need a peak oil divorcee group.

It depends on what you mean about what to do. Do you want to meet people or save up to buy a loner doomstead in the forest ? If the former, need to move somewhere that 1) has appropriate demographics 2) has low cost opportunities to meet people.

I am in that situation. I meet people through volunteer work on community advisory boards, and other community-oriented activities, walking my dog (I have a big impressive dog that attracts people), just hanging out in the park or a local cafe (all within walking distance) or through friends.

[kpeavey]

Last time I went out on a date was in 2004. It went badly, but I don't let the little things in life get me down.

Staring down Peak Oil alone is not unheard of. If you are able to make some preps, when TSHTF, you will not be alone. Plenty of people out there who will become your best friend all of a sudden.

Staring it down with limited financial resources puts you in pretty much the same boat as the rest of us. Everyone I know is broke. Some are broke at a higher standard of living.

Not knowing what to do puts you in the range of a normal human. Getting involved in the forums here, that gives you a big advantage.

When faced with a problem for which no solution or plan is in place, you should first gather information. Assess the situation to the best of your ability. Determine your advantages and inadequacies, develop a plan to address your shortcomings, proceed with that plan to the best of your ability. In short-Just do what you can.

I'd wipe out any and all superfluous spending. Free up or redirect some of that limited budget towards projects that give you long term benefits, even if its just a few cans of beans here and there. If time is available, spend it in the kitchen learning to prepare foods with staple ingredients. You can cut your grocery bill, learn a skill, and rotate your food inventory. Change your ways now, while you are in control, rather than be forced to adapt to a situation that catches you off guard. Give up the dryer, turn off the hot water tank, remove excess light bulbs, sell the TV.

Get involved in projects outside the house in an area you find interesting, and that offers a survival advantage in a peak oil situation. Gardening is inexpensive, lots of people doing it, and you get fresh produce out of it. Most importantly you will meet people with similar interests. Build on those relationships. Just because you are not emotionally involved does not mean you are alone. Friends are just as important. Go make some.

[threadbear]

too much information

[Wednesday]

Apparently I am unable to post to my own topic.

[Wednesday]

Let's see if this works now.

I will ignore the trolls and continue with my train of thought. I have a thick skin, I care not if you find the need to mock and belittle me.

Ludi, I think living on someone else land would make me feel like a slave on a plantation. Im sure if it was a choice between an ecovillage and a FEMA camp, I'd change my tune.

My plan would put me into debt. Currently I have none. My vehicles are paid for and I use my credit card to pay my auto insurance once a year just to keep it active. No debt, but I am drowning in lawyer's fees at the moment.

The plan is to find some acreage with water on it. I would prefer surface water or riverfront, but I'd settle for a well. Since I would need my job to pay off the mortgage, I would stay in Houston, rent the undeveloped land as a deer lease to help cover expenses while I pay it off. it would be nothing more than a place to bugout until I could afford to move there and begin improvements. The deer lease idea would provide a small income and guarantee a steward. The hunters would probably take better care of the land than even I would.

I don't know if this plan will work, I might not have enough time. I need alternative ideas, but I am just too freaked out by my location to really see any other way.

Houston is doomed, there is just not a nice way to say it.

[mos6507]

$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('Wednesday', '
')I think living on someone else land would make me feel like a slave on a plantation.

[Wednesday]

No family to fall back on. My sister and I are the only surviving relatives. She is raising her family and I need to do this alone now. I can not and will not impose on my sister. She's not onboard with the zombie apocalypse anyway.

I realize that no one can actually survive alone, that is why I am looking into small towns around the San Antonio and Austin areas. Even those cities are too big for me, I might go farther westward.

I don't have any doubt that I can integrate myself into a small town community, and I am sure that eventually I will meet a man I can envision a future with. I'm not holding my breath until then and I want to secure something just as soon as I settle my legal battles.

Yes, I am renting. It is a temporary solution. What irritates me was that we rented this place as a couple and now I am stuck with twice the space I need until my lease is up in September. By the time september rolls around, I need to have a plan in place.

That gives me just about 7 months to figure what I am doing next. I will no longer let a romantic partner influence my decisions. Lesson learned.

[mos6507]

$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('Wednesday', '
')I realize that no one can actually survive alone, that is why I am looking into small towns around the San Antonio and Austin areas. Even those cities are too big for me, I might go farther westward.

[Wednesday]

I've got to get the hell out of here, but I suppose you are right. It couldn't hurt to introduce myself to the community at Aaron's next public appearance. He has extended an invitation in the past but I have never attended a conference. I wonder what happened to his Galveston gig, Hurricane Ike just about wiped Galveston off the map. It was hell for weeks and it really underscored how vulnerable we are here to any service interruptions. It was an unholy mess and some parts of town still have not recovered.

I just had my heart ripped out of my chest and I'm pretty raw right now. The only reason I put up with my former boyfriends extravagance was because I was crazy about the man. I am well aware that I'm not thinking clearly, but it's going to take some time to process what I have been through in the last couple of years. I just feel such DOOM. Obama is what he is and things just keep getting more insane. For the record, I voted Libertarian. Don't blame me.

The bad news is, I sunk most of my savings into my home in Canada, gardens and root cellar and smokehouse will be enjoyed by my in-laws, I suppose.

I won't be able to recover any of it, my ex-husband will file bankruptcy.

The good news is, I didnt go into debt over it.

Maybe Fredericksburg. I want to stay near the hill country water table and away from the Chihuahuan desert.

I don't have 10 grand laying around, the only way I can secure acreage is to go into debt. I hate it.

[Ludi]

$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('Wednesday', '
')Maybe Fredericksburg.

[AgentR]

Seems like you have a mathematical "intersect" problem. Basically the people that you associate with on a day to day basis tend to also be the ones furthest removed from those with your list of acceptable attributes for a long term relationship. You meet up with those in your social circle, have fun, do stuff, and when you think you've found someone you like, you then note that they are fast spending, mall walking, bar hopping folks; and you now know where than takes you.

On the other side... The guys that would qualify on your list are living in small apartments, driving 7-12 year old cars or trucks, have a very small wardrobe that meets the basic requirements of their work; they might occasionally go hunt or fish or have a garden that they tend. You won't find them at a bar, or in the mall, or even at a professional ball game. Its not that they are unavailable, or unsociable; but rather that they aren't socializing where you are looking.

Just my hunch...

[Ainan]

Hello Wednesday, I think I know how you feel. Can't just put an ad in the personnels 'doomer seeks doomer' can we.

Anyway, cheer up, most people still expect to be rockstars and footballers in the near future so it aint all bad yet. Besides, you live in the USA where a rural doomstead can be had for $10k If I was you and I realise I am not, I would buy one, stock it with cheap food and equipment, try to get a job out there, if not stay in houston for now and keep a BOB handy. Somewhat survivalistic of course but a sensible philosophy none the less. I find that when I am stagnating and can not decide what to do, it is best to pick a reasonable course of action rather than waste time trying to determind the best one.

Best of luck, don't waste too much time finding a man.

[Wednesday]

$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('AgentR', 'S')eems like you have a mathematical "intersect" problem. Basically the people that you associate with on a day to day basis tend to also be the ones furthest removed from those with your list of acceptable attributes for a long term relationship. You meet up with those in your social circle, have fun, do stuff, and when you think you've found someone you like, you then note that they are fast spending, mall walking, bar hopping folks; and you now know where than takes you.

On the other side... The guys that would qualify on your list are living in small apartments, driving 7-12 year old cars or trucks, have a very small wardrobe that meets the basic requirements of their work; they might occasionally go hunt or fish or have a garden that they tend. You won't find them at a bar, or in the mall, or even at a professional ball game. Its not that they are unavailable, or unsociable; but rather that they aren't socializing where you are looking.

Just my hunch...

[vision-master]

You sound like the kind of woman I don't need.

[Wednesday]

$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('vision-master', 'Y')ou sound like the kind of woman I don't need.