[SeaGypsy]

Your not about to jump are you Heineken?

Nice to have people that show they care in any way; you have that here, what about in 'real life'?

I am picking up a core issue here; I will ask a few questions:

In selling the Heineken story; are you jumping to sell the Heineken package?

Given that true love begins in the mind (as distinguished from the jockstrap) how confident are you in your mind?

Are you still shaky on plans? (join the club [understatement])

Ok we have seen the bod. No disaster there.

The mind seems sound.

Whats missing?

It's not a dirty word: 'ego'.

"Where have all the real men gone" is not just a catchy line in a pop song but the most commonly heard phrase in ladies rooms throughout the dating universe.

The fact is everyone has fragilities; there is a time to show them. That's a line for you. Don't show them too early.

Practice creative visualization (fantasy)and build a piture of Heineken the Brave. "Having boldly and subtly faced the challenges of life in an uncertain world I have a plan I am confident will give me the basis for peace of mind and social security (never mind the pun)."

To sell Heineken the man you have to believe you are him and you have a decent product. Be as fussy as you are naturally and go to the ends of the earth if necessary to find the 'one'; if that is really what you want?

My opinion on the gay relationship history is: just make sure the tests are clear then keep quiet until you have no choice. Do an early homophobia check then move on. You are who you are, not the sum total of your relationships. If you can't escape on your own, look for a mentor who has.

[frankthetank]

Never tell your wife she has "lasagna" thighs on V day... not good.

[WildRose]

$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('frankthetank', 'N')ever tell your wife she has "lasagna" thighs on V day... not good.

[shakespear1]

Something for free that may help in this and other situations

http://nlpweeklymagazine.com/category/media/

Enjoy

[Heineken]

$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('SeaGypsy', 'Y')our not about to jump are you Heineken?

Nice to have people that show they care in any way; you have that here, what about in 'real life'?

I am picking up a core issue here; I will ask a few questions:

In selling the Heineken story; are you jumping to sell the Heineken package?

Given that true love begins in the mind (as distinguished from the jockstrap) how confident are you in your mind?

Are you still shaky on plans? (join the club [understatement])

Ok we have seen the bod. No disaster there.

The mind seems sound.

Whats missing?

It's not a dirty word: 'ego'.

"Where have all the real men gone" is not just a catchy line in a pop song but the most commonly heard phrase in ladies rooms throughout the dating universe.

The fact is everyone has fragilities; there is a time to show them. That's a line for you. Don't show them too early.

Practice creative visualization (fantasy)and build a piture of Heineken the Brave. "Having boldly and subtly faced the challenges of life in an uncertain world I have a plan I am confident will give me the basis for peace of mind and social security (never mind the pun)."

To sell Heineken the man you have to believe you are him and you have a decent product. Be as fussy as you are naturally and go to the ends of the earth if necessary to find the 'one'; if that is really what you want?

My opinion on the gay relationship history is: just make sure the tests are clear then keep quiet until you have no choice. Do an early homophobia check then move on. You are who you are, not the sum total of your relationships. If you can't escape on your own, look for a mentor who has.

[PenultimateManStanding]

$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('Heineken', '
')I agree about not broadcasting my past errors to every woman I meet. I've come to that conclusion on my own. Let the person get to know you first---as a human being, not a billboard of past events and experiences. Every single one of us has baggage. My baggage is nothing compared with many men's. And, darn it, I have a good heart.

Over the past week I've been communicating with a new candidate, a woman in her late 30s. She is very religious but in a pleasant, positive way, and I've had a kind of mild religious awakening myself over about the past four months. She believes strongly in forgiveness and the other positive Christian virtues. It's become obvious that we like each other very much so far. She's intelligent, decent, sincere, cheerful, and attractive. She lives a bit far from here, but it's doable. Has two teenage children and is a professional with a postgrad degree.

[WildRose]

$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('Heineken', ' ') She's intelligent, decent, sincere, cheerful, and attractive.

[Quinny]

Don't make a decision till you spend at least 5 nights sleeping with her.

If the sex is getting better then you might be on to a good thing.

If its starting to get a bit stale then run a mile.

[PenultimateManStanding]

$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('Quinny', 'D')on't make a decision till you spend at least 5 nights sleeping with her.

If the sex is getting better then you might be on to a good thing.

If its starting to get a bit stale then run a mile.

[blukatzen]

$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('Quinny', 'D')on't make a decision till you spend at least 5 nights sleeping with her.

If the sex is getting better then you might be on to a good thing.

If its starting to get a bit stale then run a mile.

[Madpaddy]

PMS wrote,

$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('', 'M')y impression is that Heineken wants a companion, that sex is a secondary consideration. Sure, he wants someone who is easy on the eyes and who doesn't? But there are issues that run deeper than that.

[Madpaddy]

Oh heres a few more tips.

The Dictionary of Dating.

$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('', 'A')TTRACTION... the act of associating horniness with a particular person.

LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT... what occurs when two extremely horny, but not entirely choosy people meet.

DATING... the process of spending enormous amounts of money, time and energy to get better acquainted with a person whom you don't especially like in the present and will learn to like a lot less in the future.

BIRTH CONTROL... avoiding pregnancy through such tactics as swallowing special pills, inserting a diaphragm, using a condom, and dating repulsive men.

EASY... a term used to describe a woman who has the sexual morals of a man.

EYE CONTACT... a method utilized by one person to indicate that they are interested in another. Despite being advised to do so, many men have difficulty looking a woman directly in the eyes, not necessarily due to shyness, but usually due to the fact that a woman's eyes are not located in her chest.

FRIEND... a person in your acquaintance who has some flaw which makes sleeping with him/her totally unappealing.

INDIFFERENCE... a woman's feeling towards a man, which is interpreted by the man to be "playing hard to get".

INTERESTING... a word a man uses to describe a woman who lets him do all the talking.

IRRITATING HABIT... what the endearing little qualities that initially attract two people to each other turn into after a few months together.

LAW OF RELATIVITY... how attractive a given person appears to be is directly proportionate to how unattractive your date is.

NYMPHOMANIAC... a man's term for a woman who wants to have sex more often than he does.

SOBER... condition in which it is almost impossible to fall in love.

[errorist]

consumerism ...

[PenultimateManStanding]

$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('Madpaddy', 'P')MS wrote,

$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('', 'M')y impression is that Heineken wants a companion, that sex is a secondary consideration. Sure, he wants someone who is easy on the eyes and who doesn't? But there are issues that run deeper than that.

[threadbear]

If I was single, this is the first place I would look. The Nation magazine, "Concerned Singles"

http://concernedsingles.com/CS_members/wsm-divs.php

Good luck, Heineken. I feel you pain, and I'm not being glib. Life is difficult enough without having to endure it alone.

[Heineken]

I very much appreciate the encouragements, as well as the caveats, from all of you. You too, you Mad Madpaddy!

I continue to make progress getting to know the new candidate. We e-mail each other every day, and are planning our first phone call for this weekend.

She's half Irish (what do you think of that, Madpaddy!---my brother's wife is also Irish) and half Caribbean black. Most unusual. Tall. Slender and feminine and very cute, and she prefers white men. So gentle and sincere and pure of heart in her messages, it overwhelms me.

She lives about 80 minutes from me. Not impossibly far, at least not until oil gets to $200/bbl. Plus there's a city midway between us where we could date.

She's totally committed to Christian ethics, but she's opened my eyes to the possibility that God would not compete with me for her love, but strengthen it. A shared faith can help cement a relationship, I suspect. I've had problems with faith as many of you know, but I've had something of a religious conversation that began before I met her. Misery and loneliness will do that to you.

I'm reading a textbook on the history of Western Civilization. What strikes me is that religion has been around since the dawn of humanity. It responds to central issues before which science and reason stand as mute dummies. In a sense, all religions are the same one force. What my own sense of reason may reject, I can accept symbolically. Perhaps that process is the key to faith.

Don't want to get too far ahead of myself here, but I have hope regarding this new person in my life.

Heine

[rangerone314]

$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('Heineken', 'S')o here I am single again, and 53. I'm in very good physical shape, however, and look ten years younger than my age.

I have money, and there are millions of attractive but desperately poor women the world 'round.

Meeting and coping with American women can be extremely difficult. They tend to have unreasonable or unfair expectations and demands. They tend to hold my age against me and my difficult history.

Sometimes I think, why don't I just fly to one of those "developing" countries, hang out, and meet and carefully court an innocent, gentle, HIV-free native, marry her and bring her back to the farm. Say a $10,000 operation.

Crazy? Maybe.

What would be the best countries? Any race is fine. Obviously the things to avoid are golddiggers, getting murdered or ripped off, etc. Potentially hazardous.

[PenultimateManStanding]

$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('Heineken', ' ')So gentle and sincere and pure of heart in her messages, it overwhelms me.

[davep]

Talking of lucking out, I met my wife in a nightclub, after splitting up with my former girlfriend.

I was in France, having found a job and not speaking the lingo properly.

I was sat on a settee above the circular sunken dancefloor and I saw an angel dancing divinely on the dancefloor. Given that I can't dance, I just gave her the eye, coolly smoking a cigarette, hoping that my native good looks *cough* would do the rest.

Then I saw her brandishing an unlit cigarette, and coming in my direction.

She came up the stairs sensually from the dancefloor Then she tripped and landed headfirst in my crotch. I gave her a light and we ended back at my place.

I learnt the lingo within three months (they do say that the best way to learn a language is to find a lover who doesn't speak yours). We've now been together for over 17 years

And as a bonus, she has the best singing voice I've ever heard, as well as a provocative body. But I do have to be on my toes as every redneck who meets her falls in love with her...

[PenultimateManStanding]

Everybody's got a different take on this issue, but it's the biggest game in town. No kidding, it is right at the top of the list. Well, right up there with food and water and shelter. But they don't make the world go around.