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"Coming Out" to the relatives

Discussions related to the physiological and psychological effects of peak oil on our members and future generations.

Re: "Coming Out" to the relatives

Unread postby oswald622 » Tue 21 Oct 2008, 03:53:32

You know, guys, we're all going to die some day anyway. And even as - if - industrial civilization collapses around us, the grass will still be green, the sky will still be blue, and the sun will still be shining.

The scariest thing about PO is not what will happen to us - it's the paradigmatic realization that we have been completely wrong about the world. We should learn from this, and consider that perhaps our PO-converted views are also wrong-headed. Even if we have the facts right, we implicitly assume in our emotional doomer outlook that the collapse of our civilization even matters.

Does it?
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Re: "Coming Out" to the relatives

Unread postby Grifter » Tue 21 Oct 2008, 04:07:34

$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('oswald622', '
')Does it?


Matters to me.

The subject quickly lead me to the realization that we live like lords, better than lords and it will be almost impossible to live like a lord in the future.

Yeah that matters to me.

Well......that and all the dying.
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Re: "Coming Out" to the relatives

Unread postby JJ » Tue 21 Oct 2008, 09:58:02

my family (what little there is) and my co-workers think I'm insane. This is helped by the fact that I was in a coma five years ago. My wife is on-board, and we are attempting to make more and more preps each day.

Yesterday we were over at an acquaintances house who has three small children; the five year old girl has osteogenisis and her legs break each time she stands up...they have broken four times since we have known them. Last week Dell hospital did surgery to place metal rods in one of her legs; she was at home and crying from the pain. It was heartbreaking, and I can't help but wonder how many children are going to suffer.....
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Re: "Coming Out" to the relatives

Unread postby WildRose » Tue 21 Oct 2008, 12:25:03

$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('JJ', '
')Yesterday we were over at an acquaintances house who has three small children; the five year old girl has osteogenisis and her legs break each time she stands up...they have broken four times since we have known them. Last week Dell hospital did surgery to place metal rods in one of her legs; she was at home and crying from the pain. It was heartbreaking, and I can't help but wonder how many children are going to suffer.....


That's very sad, JJ, so difficult for that little girl and her entire family. How fortunate we are when we have good health!
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Re: "Coming Out" to the relatives

Unread postby davep » Tue 21 Oct 2008, 12:45:37

I´m lucky because basically all my family are on-board. My Dad is involved in a local peak oil group in Wales, and his wife is involved in a seed-exchange.

My sister is in the process of trying to buy somewhere suitable.

I´m even open and honest about it with colleagues. Some think I´m a tad eccentric, but that´s OK.

The only person who doesn´t get it is my wife. Yet, despite this, she has come with me to the doomstead and is better around the garden than me. I guess she just trusts me. I´m not sure how long that will last though.
What we think, we become.
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Re: "Coming Out" to the relatives

Unread postby WildRose » Tue 21 Oct 2008, 12:58:48

We discuss energy and transportation issues, climate and environmental issues with our kids. Last night we watched The Future of Food. This generated a discussion about growing more food locally, growing more ourselves and learning to save seeds. We don't talk doom and gloom, though, because we want our kids to feel empowered about what they can do.

My parents and brothers are quite aware of the issues as well, and a couple of my in-laws are preparing for harder times. A niece of mine has land and we're repairing a generator for her. My sister-in-law installed a wood stove. Friends of ours are contemplating buying land in South America.

I'm finding that more and more people seem to be aware of these issues, through viewing videos, reading articles and talking with others. Kids are learning some of this stuff in school. I shared my gardening experience with a number of friends and neighbors this summer, just from a "it's good to know how to do this" point of view, and "try some of these tomatoes".
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Re: "Coming Out" to the relatives

Unread postby sittinguy » Tue 21 Oct 2008, 13:07:15

To my great surprise we had our best friends over for dinner a few weeks ago. A coulpe we have know since school. And they are avid hunters, so the guy thinks he could just live off the land, and is not that worried, but his wife, was very very scared about what could happen in the near future. They have no clue about my thoughts or preps She actually brought up storing food.

Me and the wife snickered at each other, knowing that we have the 1year FD supply in the closet. I never told them, but I brought her out one of my Emergency Essencials books and asked her to take a look at this if you are really worried. And she quickly asked if she could have it.

A pleasant surprise.

The husband spoke up and boldly said he could just hunt.
I said OK, you got your meat for the year, you can't live on just meat. They live near a large orange groove, and that is what he said he would live on. Deer and Oranges? The whole time his wife is hypnotized by the book I gave her. I pointed out a few begginer items to look at,, not to scare her.

I wanted to show them the stash, but resisted. Talking about it and acting on it are 2 very different things.

I have tried to talk to my Dad a few times about preparing, But he does not get it. He is one of the believers of,, It will work itself out.

The last conversation we had was him saying "so you get a little food , what do you do when it runs out"?

I said all you unprepared people will be dead, so what little is availible will go alot farther.

Sadly to say I am not sure I would share with him our relationship is somewhat jaded.

He had alot of silver rounds that he was selling me for spot. And that is what finally let him figure out I was a doomer. When I mentioned somthing about bartering in the future. He laughed at me. And as I pocketed and big handfull of round I laughed too.
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Re: "Coming Out" to the relatives

Unread postby HeckuvaJob » Tue 21 Oct 2008, 16:46:07

$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('I', 'I')'m not going to preach b/c i know you won't listen and I'm OK with that, but I think you should start thinking about a 5 year plan with regards to the state of our economy, climate, gov't, environment, civil liberties, energy, etc. I can provide you with some resources whenever you think you're ready.

$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('My sister', 'a') five year plan to do what?

In that same email she told me about the new iPod that shuffles songs when you shake it... so I don't know what to do with that. I told my aunt that the planet is running out of oil. Her response: "Yeah right!" I think I may have shot myself in the foot by preaching so hard about 9/11. Now I'm just crying wolf, apparently. Dad grew up on a farm during the depression and has proven to be a valuable resource. He seems to understand the path that our country is headed down. Unfortunately, we have about a 90min tolerance of each other, so at least all the lessons are quick.

Great thread, by the way.
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How do I have "the talk" with my parents?

Unread postby Stratovarius » Fri 24 Oct 2008, 12:59:43

I think I'm ready to sit down and have the long and uncomfortable "talk" with my mom. It doesn't seem like there's any easy way to do it and I actually think there's no point in watering it down. Might as well tell it how it is.

I discovered Martenson's crash course like 2 weeks ago, and I figured, I wouldn't even have to say anything, just make her sit down and watch the scary exponential graphs on the screen.

She also recently tied up over 10k dollars in a CD I think... Bad move. I don't trust having a bunch of money in the bank. Last time I checked, you can't eat a CD. Also I'm pretty sure it's BS that CDs track inflation.

I honestly think I could handle the money better, but it's gonna take a lot of doing to convince her to make some drastic moves with 1000s of dollars.

Any tips on turning someone into a doomer?
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Re: How do I have "the talk" with my parents?

Unread postby wisconsin_cur » Fri 24 Oct 2008, 13:02:05

Why?
http://www.thenewfederalistpapers.com
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Re: How do I have "the talk" with my parents?

Unread postby Stratovarius » Fri 24 Oct 2008, 13:06:26

$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('wisconsin_cur', 'W')hy?


???

Why not?
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Re: How do I have "the talk" with my parents?

Unread postby wisconsin_cur » Fri 24 Oct 2008, 13:08:39

$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('Stratovarius', '')$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('wisconsin_cur', 'W')hy?


???

Why not?


It can strain relationships.

It can get you written off as coo coo.

It can cause her to worry over things she can do nothing about.

It can result in a lot of things... I have yet to hear of too many stories where "the talk" has been worth it.
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Re: How do I have "the talk" with my parents?

Unread postby biofuel13 » Fri 24 Oct 2008, 13:14:26

Another duplicate thread...Just last week someone started the "Coming Out" to family thread.....

Another merge is in order mods
"With man gone will there be hope for gorilla? With gorilla gone will there be hope for man?" --Ishmael by D. Quinn
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Re: How do I have "the talk" with my parents?

Unread postby RonMN » Fri 24 Oct 2008, 13:22:11

Don't sugarcoat it...just begin "The Talk" with...A male has a penis & a female...DOH! Wrong "talk" :lol:

Seriously, my mom is fully aware of what's going on & she's in full blown panic mode. She's beyond the age of getting a job (not that she couldn't, but she shouldn't have to & currently doesn't need to).

I continue to calm her by telling her that God has her back, & if He doesn't, then I do.

I would suggest that you DON'T have the talk with her...but maybe buy some plastic shelves for her & a grocery run of canned goods for her...and then just tell her that "with these crazy & uncertain times...I want to make sure you're protected & safe...so every time you go to buy groceries, I want you to buy a few extras & add them to this shelf for just-in-case purposes".

If those CD's are FDIC insured, they're probably as safe as they can be (barring bars of gold/silver in her basement). Just make sure not to put her in a panic.
Quis custodiet ipsos custodes.
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Re: How do I have "the talk" with my parents?

Unread postby Stratovarius » Fri 24 Oct 2008, 13:28:22

$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('', '"')with these crazy & uncertain times...I want to make sure you're protected & safe...so every time you go to buy groceries, I want you to buy a few extras & add them to this shelf for just-in-case purposes".


This seems like a good idea. I think I might just give her a list of extra things to go buy.

Even if I get written off as a coo coo...I don't know, I should try at least. It's better than losing your money or not having something to eat.

$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('biofuel13', 'A')nother duplicate thread...Just last week someone started the "Coming Out" to family thread.....

Another merge is in order mods


Sorry, is there a main thread about this specific topic?
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Re: How do I have "the talk" with my parents?

Unread postby Jotapay » Fri 24 Oct 2008, 13:40:21

$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('Stratovarius', 'I') think I'm ready to sit down and have the long and uncomfortable "talk" with my mom. It doesn't seem like there's any easy way to do it and I actually think there's no point in watering it down. Might as well tell it how it is.


So you're gay? :razz:
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Re: How do I have "the talk" with my parents?

Unread postby threadbear » Fri 24 Oct 2008, 13:40:38

Putting her money into CD's was the smartest thing your mother could have done. The American dollar has gained over 20% against Canadian and other currencies, in the last few months.

You might want to inform her there could be an inflationary whipsaw effect, down the road, but other than that...forget about it.

Imagine how stupid 3/4 of the people on this board must feel for trying to initiate their friends and families into the peak oil fast crash scenario, and then it drops to almost half it's June/July level, in a couple of months.

Had you been managing your mother's money, I cringe to think what would have happened to it. Precious metals? They're down over 20% against the dollar too.

Land?? Not at the moment.
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Re: How do I have "the talk" with my parents?

Unread postby Stratovarius » Fri 24 Oct 2008, 14:05:14

$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('', 'P')recious metals? They're down over 20% against the dollar too.


This dollar rally reminds me of dying person whose body twitches in a last desperate attempt to revive itself before the final breath.

You can't eat precious metals, but I might consider buying a small amount here and there since it's at a nice low right now.

$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('Jotapay', '')$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('Stratovarius', 'I') think I'm ready to sit down and have the long and uncomfortable "talk" with my mom. It doesn't seem like there's any easy way to do it and I actually think there's no point in watering it down. Might as well tell it how it is.


So you're gay? :razz:


"The talk", not "coming out of the closet". :)
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Re: How do I have "the talk" with my parents?

Unread postby RedStateGreen » Fri 24 Oct 2008, 16:33:01

I just put 10k in a CD. Since I won't need it for a few months, seemed like a good idea.

Watch the crash course together. I'm sure she's smart enough to figure out for herself what she needs to do. Unless she had kids really late, she's my age or younger. Us X'ers are pretty canny folk. :twisted:
$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('efarmer', '&')quot;Taste the sizzling fury of fajita skillet death you marauding zombie goon!"

First thing to ask: Cui bono?
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Re: How do I have "the talk" with my parents?

Unread postby Delphis » Fri 24 Oct 2008, 17:03:35

I have been a CM disciple for a long time and I have forwarded the crash course more times than I should to people who have certainly said to my face and behind my back that I am an anihilist. I have been one for a long time apparenlty as I have been acutely aware of the plausible consequences approcahing. As for the conversation with one's parents'...I showed mine the introduction and then skipped to Chapter 20 where the 2x2 grid argument, which is used in many a mediation and simplifies the process, makes an sound argument for at the very least moving into "prep" mode from the "I can always run to the store at the last minute" mindset. Although I have a core group of people that have altered their perception of "reality" I have resigned myself to be objective and simply "show" the information to as many people as I can and let them make their own decisions. This is more difficult when you think about your loved ones sitting at home as the zombies march down the street...

Just my two cents...
"Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe."....Albert Einstein
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