[Judgie]

I have a question for you all regarding where I should go now in regards to my life and job/career.

I'm 21 (nearly 22) and doing a bachelor of environmental management. Completed highschool way back in 2003 at age 18
and then went straight into doing a Double-Degree in Information Technology. To put it simply, I finished the year but it
fell through. I went into hospitality in 2005 and 2006 and although I did well did not enjoy it, and with parents encouragement
and more than a bit of a hint that it was what they wanted me to do, I went back to uni and we end up where I am at now.

The thing is, i'm not enjoying it, and never really have. Although I can put out essays, etc of amazing quality when I work at it and get the resultant grades, I've never really in my mind been the studying/homework, etc. type., and I just don't feel motivated,particularly after waking up to the real ramifications of peak oil and climate change earlier this year. I have diagnosed myself with mild - moderate depression (and it has been affecting my performance at uni) since then,
or at least that is what I believe it to be, and have been taking St. John's Wort, which seems to be helping some. I also feel like i'm only doing it for my parents and not for me.
I plan to finish this year, and do relatively well. However, what i'd like to ask is how to deal with my parents, who believe having the highest income is everything at the expense of job and life happiness, and how not to lose my girlfriend at the same time (even though she has repeatedly told me straight out that she loves me for who I am, and not what I can give her, coming from a family where if she wanted something, she had to get/pay for it herself, she's 2.5 years younger by the way, and hoping to get into the same uni that I attend (2008 intake), to do a Bachelor of Education [Primary School]). I have already spoken to her about this, and all she could say is that she would support me in whatever I choose to do, as long as i'm happy. I DO NOT want to lose her, more importantly I do not want to dissapoint her, since she is truly in love with me (it's obvious to her parents, family friends, everyone, they've all said it, apparently she's the happiest she's ever been in the last 2 years).

I have always been attracted to the Police Force as a career (www.police.sa.gov.au), and have wanted to join for the last 3 years (I also see it as a sound and secure career choice, given what may be coming, and I have been told by many people that I seem to be, and look to be the right person for that kind of job). I am afraid though that this might be the last straw with my parents if I were to do so, especially due to the wage factors,etc (starting wage of AU$45,000 as a probationary constable). My father has no tertiary education, but has worked his way up from working in an Abbatoir in his early 20's, to a six figure salary as a manager for an Australian Petroleum company, due I have been told to his character, his personality, his integrity and his natural ability to work with and lead people). I also worry that I'd be seen as less of a person by them and others due to not completing a degree for the second time, and other worries, etc. It is primarily the worry of what may occur with my parents that is preventing me from making the move.

I also constantly worry now that I am 4 years behind the 8-ball, given that all of my class mates from high school that attended uni, will have graduated by now.

What can you all offer me in the way of advice?

Thankyou.

[Heineken]

Judgie, your first priority should be completing your academic degree. You have too much invested in that to throw it away now. Even if you don't work in that field, having the degree will give you a leg up for the rest of your life. Don't make the colossal mistake of not finishing the degree.

Don't worry about the time factor or where your former classmates are now. Don't evaluate yourself in terms of others! Believe me, you're ridiculously young and have all the time in the world. I say that from the vantage point of my 52nd birthday today.

Your second priority should be to own the fact that this is your life, not your parents' or anyone else's. Don't even consider spending the rest of your life doing what someone else thinks you should do and not what you want to do. You need to get out from under your parents' thumb; being there is now a long habit of yours extending back to infancy, but you must kick that habit to become truly adult and truly free.

Police work sounds like a good choice. You'll command a certain amount of authority and respect. Security work will be one of the last areas of employment to collapse post-peak. Also, you'll learn skills that could be very useful post-peak. Most important, it's just something you seem to want to do.

Politely listen to what others advise and collate the data, but you be the one to make the final choice, listening only to what's inside YOU.

[kjmclark]

If your parents are paying for your studies and you have less than two years to finish the degree, I think I'd stick it out and finish the environmental management program. If they aren't paying, or you have more than two years, I'd look into switching to a degree that would work for law enforcement. Remember that there are many specialties in law enforcement. Even environmental management has inspectors that may be technically law enforcement.

I would suggest you talk to some people in fields that look attractive to you, as well as people in the field you're studying now. I think they could give you better advice than your parents or us here.

[roccman]

$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('Judgie', 'I') have a question for you all regarding where I should go now in regards to my life and job/career.

I'm 21 (nearly 22) and doing a bachelor of environmental management. Completed highschool way back in 2003 at age 18
and then went straight into doing a Double-Degree in Information Technology. To put it simply, I finished the year but it
fell through. I went into hospitality in 2005 and 2006 and although I did well did not enjoy it, and with parents encouragement
and more than a bit of a hint that it was what they wanted me to do, I went back to uni and we end up where I am at now.

The thing is, i'm not enjoying it, and never really have. Although I can put out essays, etc of amazing quality when I work at it and get the resultant grades, I've never really in my mind been the studying/homework, etc. type., and I just don't feel motivated,particularly after waking up to the real ramifications of peak oil and climate change earlier this year. I have diagnosed myself with mild - moderate depression (and it has been affecting my performance at uni) since then,
or at least that is what I believe it to be, and have been taking St. John's Wort, which seems to be helping some. I also feel like i'm only doing it for my parents and not for me.
I plan to finish this year, and do relatively well. However, what i'd like to ask is how to deal with my parents, who believe having the highest income is everything at the expense of job and life happiness, and how not to lose my girlfriend at the same time (even though she has repeatedly told me straight out that she loves me for who I am, and not what I can give her, coming from a family where if she wanted something, she had to get/pay for it herself, she's 2.5 years younger by the way, and hoping to get into the same uni that I attend (2008 intake), to do a Bachelor of Education [Primary School]). I have already spoken to her about this, and all she could say is that she would support me in whatever I choose to do, as long as i'm happy. I DO NOT want to lose her, more importantly I do not want to dissapoint her, since she is truly in love with me (it's obvious to her parents, family friends, everyone, they've all said it, apparently she's the happiest she's ever been in the last 2 years).

I have always been attracted to the Police Force as a career (www.police.sa.gov.au), and have wanted to join for the last 3 years (I also see it as a sound and secure career choice, given what may be coming, and I have been told by many people that I seem to be, and look to be the right person for that kind of job). I am afraid though that this might be the last straw with my parents if I were to do so, especially due to the wage factors,etc (starting wage of AU$45,000 as a probationary constable). My father has no tertiary education, but has worked his way up from working in an Abbatoir in his early 20's, to a six figure salary as a manager for an Australian Petroleum company, due I have been told to his character, his personality, his integrity and his natural ability to work with and lead people). I also worry that I'd be seen as less of a person by them and others due to not completing a degree for the second time, and other worries, etc. It is primarily the worry of what may occur with my parents that is preventing me from making the move.

I also constantly worry now that I am 4 years behind the 8-ball, given that all of my class mates from high school that attended uni, will have graduated by now.

What can you all offer me in the way of advice?

Thankyou.

[Ferretlover]

Judgie, you already recognise the problems. You already know the answers.
Do finish your year out. It would be wrong to waste the time, money and effort.
Sit your parents down, tell them you love and respect them (it seems obvious that you do care about their feelings), but you have given the situation a great deal of thought, and you have decided to change the course you are taking. Tell them how much you value their input and support, and that you know they want you to be happy, and this (whatever change you want to make) is what is going to make you happy and successful.
Then, just do it. Law enforcement can only increase in importance in the future we all predict here.
If your girlfriend really loves you, marry her-I can't stress how much having a significant other will enhance your life. They will be there to comfort, to bounce ideas off of, and watch your back. Two, working towards a common goal, are better than one trying to do it all.

[threadbear]

Just do what most of us did a few decades ago. Tell them to--umm--Back off.

Seriously. You HAVE to rebel. Dreadlock your hair, read Daniel Pinchbeck, trip out on entheogens, follow your bliss, travel the world while you can.

[Zardoz]

Listen to Heineken and Shanny.

(Get a damned degree. You'll really regret it if you don't. You'll find that life is a series of things we don't necessarily "enjoy" but have to do anyway. Finishing up in college is a super-biggie. Get it done and move on.)

[roccman]

$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('Shannymara', 'R')occ, Judgie is in either Australia or New Zealand, I think, not the States.

[threadbear]

$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('Zardoz', 'L')isten to Heineken and Shanny.

(Get a damned degree. You'll really regret it if you don't. You'll find that life is a series of things we don't necessarily "enjoy" but have to do anyway. Finishing up in college is a super-biggie. Get it done and move on.)

[roccman]

$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('threadbear', '')$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('Zardoz', 'L')isten to Heineken and Shanny.

(Get a damned degree. You'll really regret it if you don't. You'll find that life is a series of things we don't necessarily "enjoy" but have to do anyway. Finishing up in college is a super-biggie. Get it done and move on.)

[Judgie]

You guys and girlss have no idea what it's like to just be able to talk about this with people and get something back, i feel just a bit better already!. As far as not evaluating myself in terms of others, my father has pointed out to me many times and still does, that i'm 4 years behind now and in my 23rd year of life while others are ahead, thats where that comes from, and it stuck to me after it hit home.

I know I should finish my degree and I did tell my girlfriend that that's what I would do on the night we talked. As you said, two year to go so I should stick it out. I did try to find out if the police force would allow part-time study at uni alongside initial training and then employment, but they refused to give me that kind of information unless i'd put in the application forms (we have a real crisis over here at the moment with the number of police we have, they're currently poaching them from England to maintain ranks. There is also this line in their promotional page on the website,

"Initial training at the Police Academy is linked to external tertiary qualifications and police will soon be able to work towards a degree while performing their job. Following graduation, police officers may continue study towards qualifications for promotion, embark on in service training courses and gain experience in general duties policing in preparation for their choice of career."

I have said to mates that in the future, depending on how far we don't fall, that they may well see what I call "The enviro-cop".


No, my parents are not paying for my studies, that's still a rare and unusual thing here in Australia unless you have quite rich parents who can afford to pay on an upfront full-fee basis. The majority of tertiary students study under the HELP Student Loan system. Also, I am still living at home at the moment , but really want to make the jump soon and move out (it would probably help in the mental and character building department), particularly since the girlfriend wants to do the same as she is fed up with hers. However, we need to find some prospective housemates with whom we could share the load of rent and bills on student wages before we do so.

I know they should be but I hope my grades for second semester are good, as I said, the depression (my parents are aware of the grades but no the cause, I think they'd freak or something) really wreaked havoc with my performance in first semester. But i'm doing a load better this time around, thats how it appears. Assignments in on time. Yes, I acknowledge that I must change my mindset regarding being under the thumb, this is where moving out, dealing with the bad and good it brings, would help).

No thanks Rocc, given what's about to go down over there

And yes, I'm from the state of South Australia, Australia. Below the North Territory and squashed between Western Australia, Victoria and New South Wales.

You're absolutely right about listening to others and taking it all in! Just this morning, one of the regular customers at my work place (76 years of age) who I was talking to provided me with these word's of wisdom, "Money is worth nothing if you're not your own man. You need to be your own man".

Thanks all, I'm gonna try studying today with a different mind, and I won't forget what's been wrtitten here. The best thing about today is I make my quarterly blood donation today at 3PM. That always makes me feel good :D. We have less than half a million blood donors in Australia, to serve more than 21 million people.

[Heineken]

$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('threadbear', '')$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('Zardoz', 'L')isten to Heineken and Shanny.

(Get a damned degree. You'll really regret it if you don't. You'll find that life is a series of things we don't necessarily "enjoy" but have to do anyway. Finishing up in college is a super-biggie. Get it done and move on.)

[threadbear]

$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('Heineken', '')$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('threadbear', '')$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('Zardoz', 'L')isten to Heineken and Shanny.

(Get a damned degree. You'll really regret it if you don't. You'll find that life is a series of things we don't necessarily "enjoy" but have to do anyway. Finishing up in college is a super-biggie. Get it done and move on.)

[Heineken]

It's a difficult question, T-bear.

We don't know the true origins of Judgie's depression, and he may not either.

So many people his age ARE depressed, for one reason or another. I know I was. But I'm still glad I endured my way through to my college degree and (later on) an advanced certification.

He will have to continue operating in the "standard" world for a while, since it will continue to exist for some unknown period. Thus, I would counsel him to keep one foot in this world while extending the other into the next.

Throwing caution to the wind and letting his hair down radically now could just as easily lead to bigger problems psychologically. There's no way to know for sure, but I see considerable risk there.

The essence of my post was that he should do what he wants to do and not what others want him to do. The plan of finishing his degree and then pursuing police work seems to be basically in synch with what he wants. Who knows, he might not like actually being a policeman; then he can fall back on his degree and pursue employment in the environmental services area. Or, if he likes police work, he can get further education within that field, such as an associate's degree (or its Australian equivalent) in law enforcement.

[mmasters]

Best thing you can do is take some time to figure out who you are, be flexible and keep your options open.

The myers-briggs tests can help. I mean get a handle on what your personality type is and see what careers are a best fit for that type.

For example many people on this board are INTPs

Jobs that INTPs find themselves happy in:

Scientists - especially Physics, Chemistry
Photographers
Strategic Planners
Mathematicians
University Professors
Computer Programmers, Systems Analysts, Computer Animation and Computer Specialists
Technical Writers
Engineers
Lawyers / Attorneys
Judges
Forensic Research
Forestry and Park Rangers

http://www.personalitypage.com/INTP_car.html

However remember, this isn't going to be a world where you can do whatever you want and get by, it might be somewhat that way now but that ain't gonna last. All those kids in sociology, literary science and such ain't gonna go far. Most of them wont amount to much, maybe dead even, who knows. I wouldn't suggest a career as a lawyer, there's too many; a photographer - pay sucks to live on; and keep in mind for all the technical and engineering work there's a lot of third world competition coming into the mix these days, be selective.

Finish your degree absolutely, but don't be afraid to take a break for a while if you have to. Sometimes you gotta take breaks in life. Hell I'm taking a break right now from the work force. Another thing you might think about if possible is taking a lighter class load. Don't be in a rush to get out of college and into the workforce. The workforce ain't all that.

The world these days is about who you know not what you know. So if your dad or family/friends has/have connections in the oil industry or any other industry that ain't going anywhere soon and is in the money think about using those connections.

Police work is a lot of bullshit and mostly consists of dealing with the losers in society.

Far as depression, it's ok to suffer and don't let anyone tell you otherwise.

Don't be afraid to take a break from your gf too. Sow your oats and fuck around. Being too dependant on others emotionally is a bad thing IMO.

Also being poor sucks ass. Seriously ask yourself this question: do you want to be one of the haves or the have nots?

[threadbear]

Good points, Heineken and Mmasters. I may have inadvertantly advocated for a life of grim marginalization. So Judgie, just ignore me and don't get the full body Maori tattoos, and brain piercings.

[crapattack]

What's the point of advanced education post-peak unless it's in something useful: micro-hydro engineering, irrigation management, agriculture, heck even being a chef or professional sweater knitter would be better than environmental scientist. I'd make your investment work for you by switching majors and hope like hell you have a few years to get good at something before TSHTF. If you don't think you have the time and don't want to risk it, take your SL money, buy land in the boonies with a few of your friends and learn how to grow things. FGS, don't become a cop. The last think you want to do is shoot your neighbor for looting, or break up a nest of cannibals only to find they were your university buddies.

BTW, I'm an INTP (artist & designer - how useful is that@! That's why I'm learning how to raise chickens)

[Concerned]

$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('roccman', '')$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('threadbear', '')$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('Zardoz', 'L')isten to Heineken and Shanny.

(Get a damned degree. You'll really regret it if you don't. You'll find that life is a series of things we don't necessarily "enjoy" but have to do anyway. Finishing up in college is a super-biggie. Get it done and move on.)

[Judgie]

I'll have to take that test.

As for fucking around and sowing oats, been there, done that. Besides, the happiest times I have now are with her, just last night after uni was an example :D, so taking a break from her is not bluddy likely .

I have given some thought to taking a lighter class load next year. It's 4 topics a semester so I might start at 3 next semester.

And Roccman, it's no problem, but I wasn't likely to follow that particular advice (college waste of time, etc.), but thankyou anyway.

I also just took delivery of something that WILL really help (I am THE sailor), got a windsurfing board and rig for a very good price, so bring it on when theres time!

In regards to environmental management, it's actually a seperate degree to Environmental Science at Flinders. As such it does actually include irrigation management among other topics. I already have some cookery qualifications, but I'll tell you now, if you think Police work sucks, then you haven't experienced 14 hour days in a commercial kitchen

And after going to uni yesterday and thinking about everything from a different point of view, I'm going to be a have!

[dunewalker]

Wasn't Mad Max one of the last cops on the beat in Australia? Seems that he made a career change when things got confusing.