$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('qwerty', '
')
Is that a convenient excuse for ugly people to get married/have sex?
Seriously, what is the DEFINITION of a soulmate? Metrics, definition, how do you KNOW?!?!
PeakOil is You
Do soulmates exists?
Re: Do soulmates exists?
by swingbolder » Sat 23 Sep 2006, 22:45:40
I'm sorry I can't quantify it. The feeling I have is like, me and my husband must have been stardust together sometime billions of years ago. Cause we just flow like that. We declared our love to each other the second day we met and our feelings only grow stronger with time. There could be no other for me.
As far as looks are concerned, when you've met that ONE it really doesn't matter what they look like in a conventional sense, they are beautiful to you.
Good luck.
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Re: Do soulmates exists?
by elocs » Sun 24 Sep 2006, 21:24:43
qwerty=the ultimate reason we have an "ignore" button. The stuff he has written gives drivel a bad name. And now, to employ the "ignore" button. I love this part.
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Re: Do soulmates exists?
by galacticsurfer » Mon 25 Sep 2006, 08:57:01
I think Qwerty is either:
1) An extremely advanced spiirtual being (who got born on earth accidentally)
2)on LSD all the time
or
3) Is feeding us all a load of B.S.
Cool dream, by the way.
Just Matt seems to lack a bit of humour/ be too survivalist on this matter, but hey, he makes a living at this stuff, so I can understand that.
I myself am a cyncial/practical idealist. I like to think I have total free will within bounds of my existence, but practically speaking have little room for maneuver. I mean like we are ants in a big ant hill living according to a plan of our genetic, social , environmental programming but each one of us feels somehow free within these boundaries to adjust certain parameters(partner choice, career,etc) at certain points in time, after which we are pretty much stuck for life. I know that too much free choice/free will is paralyzing to people. A certain amount of structure( a religion/culture with moral rules, etc. career path) allows development of personality in ordered paths. Take chaos of 60s / 70s for lots of hippy types. Drugs, sex and Rock and roll(and LSD and indian spirituality and astrology ) only went so far within the structure of current society. This bred a lot of cyncism among next generation who saw the bad results (broken families, wasted lives, Aids epidemic). I try however to integrate modern realism within the new spirituality of New Age spiritualism and sexuality. A rejection of 60s radical sexual and drug behavior combined with a clinging to the real meaning behind those changes(greater meaning in a desperately meaningless world about to self destruct) through eastern philosophy, etc. study of other cultures much older/wiser than European culture. If we see a deeper meaning in our intensely monogamous relationships(open to kama Sutra, etc. not with heavy guilt like in Victorian era) without going overboard and thinking we were "born for the other person" we have a lot of freedom to grow and develop in our relation to one another. Love grows day by day. Constant bed hopping until 40 years old or more is just as empty as marrying your first girl/boyfriend out of high school/college without work/life experience. This is of course just general but approximately correct for most people nowadays.
Cynicism is a souless bitch but too much idealism/religion can be overbearing and deterministic.
The Dover Bitch
by Anthony Hecht
A Criticism of Life: for Andrews Wanning
So there stood Matthew Arnold and this girl
With the cliffs of England crumbling away behind them,
And he said to her, 'Try to be true to me,
And I'll do the same for you, for things are bad
All over, etc., etc.'
Well now, I knew this girl. It's true she had read
Sophocles in a fairly good translation
And caught that bitter allusion to the sea,
But all the time he was talking she had in mind
The notion of what his whiskers would feel like
On the back of her neck. She told me later on
That after a while she got to looking out
At the lights across the channel, and really felt sad,
Thinking of all the wine and enormous beds
And blandishments in French and the perfumes.
And then she got really angry. To have been brought
All the way down from London, and then be addressed
As a sort of mournful cosmic last resort
Is really tough on a girl, and she was pretty.
Anyway, she watched him pace the room
And finger his watch-chain and seem to sweat a bit,
And then she said one or two unprintable things.
But you mustn't judge her by that. What I mean to say is,
She's really all right. I still see her once in a while
And she always treats me right. We have a drink
And I give her a good time, and perhaps it's a year
Before I see her again, but there she is,
Running to fat, but dependable as they come.
And sometimes I bring her a bottle of Nuit d' Amour.
One of my favorite poems.
1) An extremely advanced spiirtual being (who got born on earth accidentally)
2)on LSD all the time
or
3) Is feeding us all a load of B.S.
Cool dream, by the way.
Just Matt seems to lack a bit of humour/ be too survivalist on this matter, but hey, he makes a living at this stuff, so I can understand that.
I myself am a cyncial/practical idealist. I like to think I have total free will within bounds of my existence, but practically speaking have little room for maneuver. I mean like we are ants in a big ant hill living according to a plan of our genetic, social , environmental programming but each one of us feels somehow free within these boundaries to adjust certain parameters(partner choice, career,etc) at certain points in time, after which we are pretty much stuck for life. I know that too much free choice/free will is paralyzing to people. A certain amount of structure( a religion/culture with moral rules, etc. career path) allows development of personality in ordered paths. Take chaos of 60s / 70s for lots of hippy types. Drugs, sex and Rock and roll(and LSD and indian spirituality and astrology ) only went so far within the structure of current society. This bred a lot of cyncism among next generation who saw the bad results (broken families, wasted lives, Aids epidemic). I try however to integrate modern realism within the new spirituality of New Age spiritualism and sexuality. A rejection of 60s radical sexual and drug behavior combined with a clinging to the real meaning behind those changes(greater meaning in a desperately meaningless world about to self destruct) through eastern philosophy, etc. study of other cultures much older/wiser than European culture. If we see a deeper meaning in our intensely monogamous relationships(open to kama Sutra, etc. not with heavy guilt like in Victorian era) without going overboard and thinking we were "born for the other person" we have a lot of freedom to grow and develop in our relation to one another. Love grows day by day. Constant bed hopping until 40 years old or more is just as empty as marrying your first girl/boyfriend out of high school/college without work/life experience. This is of course just general but approximately correct for most people nowadays.
Cynicism is a souless bitch but too much idealism/religion can be overbearing and deterministic.
The Dover Bitch
by Anthony Hecht
A Criticism of Life: for Andrews Wanning
So there stood Matthew Arnold and this girl
With the cliffs of England crumbling away behind them,
And he said to her, 'Try to be true to me,
And I'll do the same for you, for things are bad
All over, etc., etc.'
Well now, I knew this girl. It's true she had read
Sophocles in a fairly good translation
And caught that bitter allusion to the sea,
But all the time he was talking she had in mind
The notion of what his whiskers would feel like
On the back of her neck. She told me later on
That after a while she got to looking out
At the lights across the channel, and really felt sad,
Thinking of all the wine and enormous beds
And blandishments in French and the perfumes.
And then she got really angry. To have been brought
All the way down from London, and then be addressed
As a sort of mournful cosmic last resort
Is really tough on a girl, and she was pretty.
Anyway, she watched him pace the room
And finger his watch-chain and seem to sweat a bit,
And then she said one or two unprintable things.
But you mustn't judge her by that. What I mean to say is,
She's really all right. I still see her once in a while
And she always treats me right. We have a drink
And I give her a good time, and perhaps it's a year
Before I see her again, but there she is,
Running to fat, but dependable as they come.
And sometimes I bring her a bottle of Nuit d' Amour.
One of my favorite poems.
"The horror, the horror"
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galacticsurfer - Coal
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- Joined: Wed 09 Nov 2005, 04:00:00
Re: Do soulmates exists?
by Roy » Mon 25 Sep 2006, 14:29:12
Qwerty, sounds like you have some pretty unrealistic expectations. I can't blame you personally because our whole media experience in this country is based on exactly that.
I can tell you from my experience that you're not going to attract the "one" until you get your shit together. Until you know who you are, until you're happy with that guy, and until its obvious to your potential woman that you're not full of shit. [If you're rich then you're going to have to weed out the gold diggers (sorry ladies) because they'll hover around you like flies around a fresh pile of shit and look damn good doing it.]
Until that time, women will come and go. You'll attract the wrong ones, women who like your car, your job, or your athletic body or whatever. Those relationships, in my experience, are doomed to fail.
If projecting status isn't your game then be prepared to bide your time. Women don't want a whiner for the most part.
They want a confident man who knows where he's going. You aren't that yet. Not saying you can't be, just that your posts lead me to believe you're focusing too much on the physical, and on what other people think.
Turn your focus inward and get your act together. If you don't have tons of cash that's ok, but you won't attract runway model types most likely.
I met my soulmate after 10 years of dating and unfulfilling, financially ruinous relationships. Those relationships were predicated on appearances, status, and other superficial bullshit.
On my first date with my soulmate over 10 years ago, I did something that I'd never done prior; I was upfront with her about my beliefs, my lifestyle, and my goals in life. She later told me at first it put her off, but then she realized she liked my honesty and frugality and admired my guts in not playing games with her. The rest is history!
I'd played the dating game too long. The intricate dance of lies and deception all performed so that we get "the perfect" mate who we perceive others will envy. I went against my core beliefs, acting like I thought I was "supposed to". After getting burned one too many times I just decided "I'm either going to get a woman that likes ME, or I'll just be alone.
The key is finding someone who shares your outlook on life and your long term goals. The small stuff can be worked out. However, a perfect girlfriend who doesn't want kids if you do, for example, will lead to a breakup, no matter how great you are together. And the longer you stay with her pretending it doesn't matter, the worse the breakup will be.
To sum up, be honest, develop a sense of self, and don't waste time dating women just because they're sexy!
When you get there, women will know it. They will sense it, and you will attract the woman that's right for you. She may not be the most physically attractive woman, but inside is what counts. Because, guess what my friend, looks fade. Who knows, you may get lucky and find your soulmate to be good looking as well as perfect for you.
Unfortunately there are no easy answers. I guess its mostly trial and error. I made many errors. But I've never regretted asking my soulmate out for that first date or laying my feelings about life out up front.
If she doesn't like the real you then spending $$ courting her is not smart. Be yourself, like yourself, and the rest will come no matter what you look like or how much money you have.
PS: Even your soulmate will piss you off sometimes. That's reality. We're all human. How can there be a high, figuratively speaking, if there is never a low?
I can tell you from my experience that you're not going to attract the "one" until you get your shit together. Until you know who you are, until you're happy with that guy, and until its obvious to your potential woman that you're not full of shit. [If you're rich then you're going to have to weed out the gold diggers (sorry ladies) because they'll hover around you like flies around a fresh pile of shit and look damn good doing it.]
Until that time, women will come and go. You'll attract the wrong ones, women who like your car, your job, or your athletic body or whatever. Those relationships, in my experience, are doomed to fail.
If projecting status isn't your game then be prepared to bide your time. Women don't want a whiner for the most part.
They want a confident man who knows where he's going. You aren't that yet. Not saying you can't be, just that your posts lead me to believe you're focusing too much on the physical, and on what other people think.
Turn your focus inward and get your act together. If you don't have tons of cash that's ok, but you won't attract runway model types most likely.
I met my soulmate after 10 years of dating and unfulfilling, financially ruinous relationships. Those relationships were predicated on appearances, status, and other superficial bullshit.
On my first date with my soulmate over 10 years ago, I did something that I'd never done prior; I was upfront with her about my beliefs, my lifestyle, and my goals in life. She later told me at first it put her off, but then she realized she liked my honesty and frugality and admired my guts in not playing games with her. The rest is history!
I'd played the dating game too long. The intricate dance of lies and deception all performed so that we get "the perfect" mate who we perceive others will envy. I went against my core beliefs, acting like I thought I was "supposed to". After getting burned one too many times I just decided "I'm either going to get a woman that likes ME, or I'll just be alone.
The key is finding someone who shares your outlook on life and your long term goals. The small stuff can be worked out. However, a perfect girlfriend who doesn't want kids if you do, for example, will lead to a breakup, no matter how great you are together. And the longer you stay with her pretending it doesn't matter, the worse the breakup will be.
To sum up, be honest, develop a sense of self, and don't waste time dating women just because they're sexy!
When you get there, women will know it. They will sense it, and you will attract the woman that's right for you. She may not be the most physically attractive woman, but inside is what counts. Because, guess what my friend, looks fade. Who knows, you may get lucky and find your soulmate to be good looking as well as perfect for you.
Unfortunately there are no easy answers. I guess its mostly trial and error. I made many errors. But I've never regretted asking my soulmate out for that first date or laying my feelings about life out up front.
If she doesn't like the real you then spending $$ courting her is not smart. Be yourself, like yourself, and the rest will come no matter what you look like or how much money you have.
PS: Even your soulmate will piss you off sometimes. That's reality. We're all human. How can there be a high, figuratively speaking, if there is never a low?
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- Expert
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Re: Do soulmates exists?
by qwerty » Mon 25 Sep 2006, 19:03:44
Thanks for sharing your info Roy, here is just a few comments I have:
$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('Roy', '
')
They want a confident man who knows where he's going. You aren't that yet. Not saying you can't be, just that your posts lead me to believe you're focusing too much on the physical, and on what other people think.
$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('Roy', '
')
They want a confident man who knows where he's going. You aren't that yet. Not saying you can't be, just that your posts lead me to believe you're focusing too much on the physical, and on what other people think.
First, I'm not interested in 'They', just 'her' (if it exists).
Second, when you say confident you really mean
'CON'-fident -> http://www.peakoil.com/fortopic23672.html
Last, what EXACTLY in this thread about soulmates did I ever focus on anything physical at all? You must be mistaking this for the other thread about the "most beautiful woman/girl in the universe". They are not related... And besides I wasn't talking about superficial beauty that America is brainwashed with, but rather true beauty. TRUE PERFECTION. Just something to admire, something that is finally WORTH admiring in this rotten world, something to make you forget peak oil and stone age cometh, PNAC and Neocons raping the world of resources and killing all lifeform on earth, something to take your breath away...
$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('Roy', '
')To sum up, be honest, develop a sense of self, and don't waste time dating women just because they're sexy!
Just what exactly is this 'sense of self' are you talking about?
You claim to have the answers but you don't even know the question.
Is there a 'self' at all? If so, what is the core essence of the existential 'self'? No one seems to know that, certaintly not you.
$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('Roy', '
')On my first date with my soulmate over 10 years ago, I did something that I'd never done prior; I was upfront with her about my beliefs, my lifestyle, and my goals in life. She later told me at first it put her off, but then she realized she liked my honesty and frugality and admired my guts in not playing games with her. The rest is history!
Thats all it takes to find a soulmate? To be honest? Many people who claim to believe in soulmates only do so after the fact.
To them its retrospective, if it worked out then its called a soulmate, if not then not. Thats kind of like what the Bible does.
If you pray and it works then its God, if it didn't then its Satan...
$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('Roy', '
')If she doesn't like the real you then spending $$ courting her is not smart.
Now you beginning to sound like Matt Savinar.....
$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('Roy', '
')Be yourself, like yourself, and the rest will come no matter what you look like or how much money you have.
Again, there most likely isn't a 'self'. So how can I be myself, or like myself? A mirror cannot reflect 'it-self'.
What is your definition of soulmate by the way? Have you meet yours? Do you believe in soulmates? And what is your definition of soulmate? Do you think they are the same chunk of mass of stardusts that exploded in a cosmic supernova billions of years ago
that now unites and finally meets again reincarnated in human life form? Does the term 'soulmate' simply mean the supremum, ie the ONE singular most compatible mate of all the other 3.4 billion + potential mates out there on planet earth?
What is the criteria? Does soulmate simply mean someone you are deeply in love with and thus coined the term for him/her or is it fate and destiny, that in this universe there is ONE AND ONLY ONE that is truly alwaus been yours and waiting for you? (aka twin-soul)
I'll admit, the idea of a twin-soul is about as likely as the idea that Christ was the son of God and died for our sins. yet even I the seeker of truth am tempted to delude myself and be in denial from time to time, I so wish soulmates are REAL!
"...the US, Great Britain, and Israel; the real Axis of Evil..." - Michael C. Ruppert
