PeakOil is You
Peak Oil and relationships
Re: Peak Oil and relationships
by Cashmere » Thu 22 May 2008, 07:49:03
$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('', 'J')esus Christ, Cashmere, do you even know what a relationship IS? It's that thing when two people share mutual affection and RESPECT. Why should a woman hang around if you're going to shit on her opinion, but demand complete and total respect for your own?
Bullshit K----. I call bullshit.
Respect is earned.
The way some candy-asses on this site are telling it, their wives are ignorant and snide, and I'd sooner be alone then let another person be both. Ignorant and deferential, OK. Well informed and snide, OK.
But they way some of these guys describe it, they go to their wives, who have jack shit knowledge about the relevant information, and they attempt to show them/teach them what is a critical subject to them and to their kids.
And what do they get in return?
A fucking eye roll?
Fuck that.
If I did hundreds of hours of research on ANYTHING and then presented my conclusion to my wife and she <b><i>rolled her fucking eyes</b></i>, that would be the exact same thing as her saying - "you're an incompetent idiot and even without taking the time to review the info, I don't have enough respect for you to view your opinion favorably."
Very simply, if your significant other/wife is such a complete and utter moron and ditz and has so little regard for your ability to reason that she eye rolls and shrugs off something that you say is critical for her to learn about . . .
. . . she is either an idiot, a person who thinks you're an idiot, or both.
It's really as simple as that.
If my wife spent 500 hours researching ANY topic and then came to me and said, "hey hon, you really need to understand this because . . . ", I would immediately sit down and start reading. Under no circumstances would I roll my eyes. My G-d, this is my wife we're talking about.
<b><i><u>I</b></i></u> don't know what a relationship is about?
You're G-d damned right I do, and if I didn't respect my wife enough to listen and learn when she spends time learning something and then wants to share it with me, he closest friend and confidante, then I wouldn't deserve her.
You people are nuts if you think that a solid relationship is built on your wife being willfully ignorant, disrespectful to you for your efforts to be informed, and openly degrading with behavior like eye rolls and shitty comments like, "should I get a can of soup in case your PO happens tonight?"
No you G-d awful bitch, shove the can up your ass so it'll be right next to your mouth when the day comes that you are hungry.
I'm always amazed at the kind of horse shit some guys will put up with just to have a warm body next to them at night.
Massive Human Dieoff <b>must</b> occur as a result of Peak Oil. Many more than half will die. It will occur everywhere, including where <b>you</b> live. If you fail to recognize this, then your odds of living move toward the "going to die" group.
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Cashmere - Heavy Crude
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Re: Peak Oil and relationships
by Marie » Thu 22 May 2008, 11:17:01
If you have a SO who is intelligent, loyal, and resourceful and loves you for who you are, it's foolish to throw it all away simply because he/she isn't open to PO right now. Most rational people will come around sooner or later. For the sake of morale and division of labor, we're far better off with a partner than by ourselves.
As someone who is engaged to a guy who is great in every way except for his dismissal of my "doomer theories," this is how I justify it to myself.
As someone who is engaged to a guy who is great in every way except for his dismissal of my "doomer theories," this is how I justify it to myself.
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Re: Peak Oil and relationships
by Bman4k1 » Thu 22 May 2008, 12:31:53
$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('BigTex', 'S')he'll come around.
Just be nice to her.
Talk generally about different future scenarios and how well prepared you are for different events.
Focus on preparations that are not peak oil specific: pay down debt, buy fuel efficient vehicles, improve your home's energy efficiency.
Grow a garden.
Ride your bike.
Stuff like that.
Give her the tools to come to her own understanding of it, rather than basically pushing her into agreeing with your understanding of it.
Be gentle.
Just be nice to her.
Talk generally about different future scenarios and how well prepared you are for different events.
Focus on preparations that are not peak oil specific: pay down debt, buy fuel efficient vehicles, improve your home's energy efficiency.
Grow a garden.
Ride your bike.
Stuff like that.
Give her the tools to come to her own understanding of it, rather than basically pushing her into agreeing with your understanding of it.
Be gentle.
Thanks for all of the responses, I wasn't expecting this flood of replies.
ya shes on board with installing solar panels, and shes paying down her student loan, but shes still set on buying a 330i BMW (but I still think shes slowly changing her mind, she was looking at some fuel efficient cars). But she might come around on that, but I guess I have to pick my battles.
Like shes at the point if I even mention anything relating to PO she shuts down. I mean there is an age difference and Im just starting out in the working world, so there's only so much preperation I can personally do, I need her help to do most of it. And with the housing market (Alberta/BC) I will need a SO in order for me to get a home that can serve the post-PO world.
And she understands everything I tell her, and was I was in the explaination stage she agreed with everything. She is just scared to death of preparing.
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Re: Peak Oil and relationships
by Cashmere » Fri 23 May 2008, 11:28:45
What is the age difference? Is she older than you? If so, by how much?
Somebody wrote:
$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('', '"')If you have a SO who is intelligent, loyal, and resourceful and loves you for who you are, it's foolish to throw it all away simply because he/she isn't open to PO right now. "
Somebody wrote:
$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('', '"')If you have a SO who is intelligent, loyal, and resourceful and loves you for who you are, it's foolish to throw it all away simply because he/she isn't open to PO right now. "
"Open to PO"?
No.
If the person is intelligent and doesn't think you're an idiot, then what could possibly explain why he's blowing you off?
I don't buy it, and I don't think you're better off with a doubting Thomas in the bed with you. There are too many good people who would make a better partner.
Massive Human Dieoff <b>must</b> occur as a result of Peak Oil. Many more than half will die. It will occur everywhere, including where <b>you</b> live. If you fail to recognize this, then your odds of living move toward the "going to die" group.
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Cashmere - Heavy Crude
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Re: Peak Oil and relationships
by jedinvest » Fri 23 May 2008, 17:47:58
$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('Cashmere', 'A')nd what do they get in return?
A fucking eye roll?
Fuck that.
A fucking eye roll?
Fuck that.
Cashmere, you're hilarious. You strike me as a very black-and-white person. If you can get away with that and are so lucky to have such a spouse, the more power to you.
All I can say, it is difficult enough without PO to stay in a supportive marriage and not have life come apart at the seams at times.
I always laugh at the incongruities before I cry:
While we are having conversations with acquaintances (not close friends, not yet at least) my wife has to present my 'negative forebodings' to the guess, such as: "We want to fly to Europe as soon as possible before it is no longer possible." Their eyes usually open wide at this and I have to explain that we are just concerned about rising fuel prices and inflation to tone the conversation down. I think my wife is testing me, trying to demonstrate how idiotic my ideas are in the context of common knowledge.
The other night she started watching American Idol for the first time (because she knows I don't waste my time with T.V. except for historical and news-worthy programming and that I spend too much time with PO on the web, which can't be any good, especially when I describe that Jack character!) .
Anyway, I find it completely humorous that I am relying upon my wife for my bug-out in central america (she's Guatemalan) where people actually live close to sustainable livestyles but she came here to the U.S.A. because she so adores the American culture of doing everything better all the time.
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