by PhebaAndThePilgrim » Sun 23 Mar 2008, 13:20:47
Good day from Pheba, from the farm:
Good morning. Pilgrim is outside working on the farm. I am here at the computer being lazy.
I have given this a bit of thought and I think there is more than one level of a "Doomer". I am a doomer. I arrived at being a doomer from several years of research and mental angst.
First and foremost I am not wringing my hands at glee at the prospect at the coming downfall.
I am deeply saddened. It has taken a few years to come to terms with everything and have it all sink in.
I worry about my kids and grandkids.
There is a block of doomers that do look at this with glee.
Somehow the message of Derrick Jensen has become skewed.
While I believe Jensen wants it to come down, I do not believe he is happy about it. He also seems to carry a burden of sadness that has turned into acceptance that life as we know it must come to an end.
The basic laws of physics and mathematics demand it.
that being said, it sure doesn't mean a person should be happy about it. I believe it is the gleeful doomers that turn people off.
I have a good girlfriend. We were talking about this just yesterday.
I told her that my daughter recently told me that I was a negative person. Her statement hurt my feelings. My daughter doesn't understand how much research I have done. I did not elaborate because I did not want to alienate her, or worry her.
I did tell my girlfriend. My girlfriend said that she would not call me negative, she says I am one of the most "critical" persons she has ever met.
I told her that I do not criticize people. She said I was misunderstanding what she meant by the word critical. She means that I critique situations looking for the truth or falseness of the situation.
She said that if more people were as critical as I was, that we would not be in the mess we were in.
I still do not fully understand what she meant. I have always thought that critical meant one thing and critique meant another.
So, are we doomers?, critical thinkers?, negative thinkers?, etc.
Exactly what are we? Maybe we are a bit of all of the above, and there is a variation within all of us, depending on our mindset on a particular day, and depending on how far we are on the journey of discovery.
On some days I try to steer completely free from the reality of Peak Oil, overpopulation, resource depletion, global warming, etc. etc.
Most of the time it just keeps getting pushed in my face.
Recently I have started something new, and I just can't help it.
When I am out in traffic, or out in the world, or looking at our beautiful farm, I just keep telling myself, and saying out loud:
This can't end. it's too big, too powerful. Somewhere, someway, the powers that be, just won't let all of this end.
The Home Depots, Wal-Marts, sellers, buyers, consumers, etc. just will not let this end.
There will always be cars, we will always drive, there will always be plenty of food, fertilizer, and 5 billion people will not have to die of starvation.
I started my research back in 1995. I came into acceptance in about 2003. Now I am trying to go back into some form of denial.
Labels are a dangerous thing. I call myself a doomer, but I wonder what I really am.
More important: what am I evolving into?
I used to be a born again Christian. Now I am a total atheist.
We grow, we change, we deny, we learn.
I guess I'll just sign myself:
Pheba, from the farm.