When the pressure and frustration build to critical mass, it is important to open up the relief valve before you head succumbs to saponic pressure and explodes.
I offer no other subject or theme in this thread. In fact, if the moderators would please delete anything with a hint of seriousness, that might be helpful
bring it on
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I've seen this forum topic for a few days now, been itching to respond in my own way...
1 in 4 Teenage Girls has a Sexual Disease
The other 3 are just tramps
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These 2 guys walk into a bar...
Do you think the 2nd guy would have ducked?
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Neal Boortz has a page on his site he calls The Redneck Scrapbook
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PeakOil is You
Comic Relief
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Comic Relief
by kpeavey » Mon 17 Mar 2008, 18:14:50
If you want a picture of the future, imagine a boot stamping on a human face--for ever."
-George Orwell, 1984
_____
twenty centuries of stony sleep were vexed to nightmare by a rocking cradle, and what rough beast, its hour come round at last, slouches towards Bethlehem to be born?
-George Yeats
-George Orwell, 1984
_____
twenty centuries of stony sleep were vexed to nightmare by a rocking cradle, and what rough beast, its hour come round at last, slouches towards Bethlehem to be born?
-George Yeats
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kpeavey - Expert
- Posts: 1670
- Joined: Mon 04 Oct 2004, 03:00:00
Re: Comic Relief
by PrairieMule » Mon 17 Mar 2008, 18:40:49
International Hell
A man dies and goes to hell. There he finds that there is a different hell for each country. He goes first to the German hell and asks What do they do here?" He is told
"First they put you in an electric chair for an hour. Then they lay you on a bed of nails for another hour. Then the German devil comes in and whips you for the rest of the day."
The man does not like the sound of that at all, so he moves on. He checks out the USA hell as well as the Russian hell and many more. He discovers that they are all more or less the same as the German hell.
Then he comes to the Nigerian hell and finds that there is a very long line of people waiting to get in. Amazed he asks "What do they do here?" He is told "First they put you in an electric chair for an hour. Then they lay you on a bed of nails for another hour. Then the Nigerian devil comes in and whips you for the rest of the day."
"But that is exactly the same as all the other hells - why are there so many people waiting to get in?"
Because there is never any electricity, so the electric chair does not work, someone stole all the nails, and the devil used to be a public servant, so he comes in, punches his time-card and then goes back home..."
A man dies and goes to hell. There he finds that there is a different hell for each country. He goes first to the German hell and asks What do they do here?" He is told
"First they put you in an electric chair for an hour. Then they lay you on a bed of nails for another hour. Then the German devil comes in and whips you for the rest of the day."
The man does not like the sound of that at all, so he moves on. He checks out the USA hell as well as the Russian hell and many more. He discovers that they are all more or less the same as the German hell.
Then he comes to the Nigerian hell and finds that there is a very long line of people waiting to get in. Amazed he asks "What do they do here?" He is told "First they put you in an electric chair for an hour. Then they lay you on a bed of nails for another hour. Then the Nigerian devil comes in and whips you for the rest of the day."
"But that is exactly the same as all the other hells - why are there so many people waiting to get in?"
Because there is never any electricity, so the electric chair does not work, someone stole all the nails, and the devil used to be a public servant, so he comes in, punches his time-card and then goes back home..."
If you give a man a fish you will have kept him from hunger for a day. If you teach a man to fish he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.
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PrairieMule - Expert
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Re: Comic Relief
by PenultimateManStanding » Mon 17 Mar 2008, 19:04:09
$this->bbcode_second_pass_quote('PrairieMule', '
')Because there is never any electricity, so the electric chair does not work, someone stole all the nails, and the devil used to be a public servant, so he comes in, punches his time-card and then goes back home..."
Count me in, but will there be Golem there? If so, then put me in a parallel Universe. I'll try my chances there. Or better yet, send me to Heaven. I've been good. Nice to my kids, and nice to my cat.')Because there is never any electricity, so the electric chair does not work, someone stole all the nails, and the devil used to be a public servant, so he comes in, punches his time-card and then goes back home..."
Turn those Machines back On! - Don Ameche in Trading Places
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PenultimateManStanding - Expert
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Re: Comic Relief
by kpeavey » Mon 17 Mar 2008, 21:35:41
Another thread title
how would you spend 660 billion dollars?
WHORES AND BLOW
how would you spend 660 billion dollars?
WHORES AND BLOW
If you want a picture of the future, imagine a boot stamping on a human face--for ever."
-George Orwell, 1984
_____
twenty centuries of stony sleep were vexed to nightmare by a rocking cradle, and what rough beast, its hour come round at last, slouches towards Bethlehem to be born?
-George Yeats
-George Orwell, 1984
_____
twenty centuries of stony sleep were vexed to nightmare by a rocking cradle, and what rough beast, its hour come round at last, slouches towards Bethlehem to be born?
-George Yeats
-
kpeavey - Expert
- Posts: 1670
- Joined: Mon 04 Oct 2004, 03:00:00
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