by PolestaR » Wed 03 May 2006, 21:10:34
I'm a relatively big time doomer (with proof to back up the fears like most) and get depressed time to time about the end times approaching. It's not that I care if I die or not, just that I'm not preparing the best I can for it, or something along those lines. Not quite sure exactly, but PO true awareness doesn't exactly make you the life of the party.
No now your Mr ShitPants, willing to shit on everyone's consumerist dream to buy 5 houses and a truck to travel to work in. Everytime I hear a god-damn fucking person tell me their plans or what they are up to I feel like fucking stabbing them with the truth. Sometimes I hold back, others not, it's hard. The less you deal with people in general the better your mind will be for it, unless of course you actually need a lot of social input to function (you'll probably be one of the first to die when shtf). My advice is to get a partner, or a group of people who share your thoughts and stick with them. That's what I have and when I'm not depressed I'm relatively happy.
Either way you're stuck in this waiting vortex not unlike most christians who are seeking their end times, thinking they are the unique generation (like 80 of them have since Jesus supposedly died). Quite frankly I wish it would happen now, and I try to do my best to make it happen sooner rather than later.
I used to be a christian, from my childhood up until a year or 2 ago. The older I got the less I "really" believed in it, but I prayed occasionally and still thought Jesus existed, etc. I mostly believed in christianity due to elder relatives (when I was like 6 or 7) warping my mind thinking that 1996 was going to be Judgement day, which started my fascination with Revelations and the end times.
Either way, christianity is bullshit, after I free'd myself from its grasp and got over the "what happens when I die" depression, I am actually a lot better now. It is like a massive burden off your shoulders. You have one life, live it, fuck the rules society gave you, fuck the morals your parents and society gave you, they mean nothing. Everything is on the table. From a christian perspective I would call myself someone deeply ingrained with Satan, but from my new perspective I'm like a caged lion let out back into the wild. It's very hard to become wild and back in touch with your true self, deprogramming from societies and other inputs. I'm not joking either. Most facets of the programming exist so you can be in the community where these values are desired, so unless you're a good actor you'll likely have to be the loner type to avoid early inprisonment.
Bringing sexy back..... to doom