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Page added on May 15, 2014
Change is coming – Hold on tight
Seems like every week I get emails from yet another group that is “creating a network of local groups” for social change. Or expanding into a new reskilling class series. Or cultivating a citywide vision plan. Each of them valid in their focus, each one tackling their own aspect of The Great Turning. And each of them scrabbling for the same – limited – discretionary hours of volunteers and attendees.
Wonderful things are happening. The world truly is poised to make transformative change. Yet the cars still pour onto the freeway each morning, jets still roar at the airport, we continue to burn oil and belch CO2 emissions, buy-buy-buy, as we dutifully march on with the “ordinary” part of our lives.
Gotta make a living. Gotta raise the kids. Gotta visit the grandparents/show the kids Europe. Gotta stop by Target/Walmart/Costco and get something, etc. As much as the new consciousness is here, the old ways still press upon us.
I don’t have time
People who still have conventional jobs now have longer hours and are busier than ever. People I know who used to have volunteer time now have overly-full calendars. Commerce calls. This momentary, frantic flurry in the conventional economy (dare I describe it as a spasm in its death throes?) has everyone desperately grappling to “catch up” for losses in the down years, or telling themselves they’re going to “get ahead while we can.”
There’s more positive change happening than ever. But it seems like people are busier than ever, and they have less time than ever, to experience the new ways. 
Within The Great Turning, part of the vision includes a different pace: Slow food. Slow money. Stop and smell the roses. Time to appreciate. Time for relationships to unfold.
We talk about change. We say we dream about it. We secretly yearn for it. But then “real life” calls, and the parts of our lives which we haven’t yet transitioned get our time. And it never seems to get around to the Just Say No part.
I don’t want to
We have to let something go. In order to make room (time) for the new, we have to let go of the old ways. In order to embrace the new ways we have to let go of the old.
Maybe it means letting go of that vision that raising “educated” young people means they’re in a billion “activities” and they’ve all been to Europe at least once.
Maybe it means letting go of that concept that being a “good” son or daughter somehow means flying cross-country to family reunions each holiday.
Maybe it means letting go of a certain (conventional) way of making a living, to take the deep-breath leap to start a new-future business.
Maybe it means letting go of that vision of luxury retirement, to figure out how to cobble together something much more realistic.
Maybe it means letting go of the “power” to go anywhere we want any moment we want with the turn of a key and a gasoline engine.
Maybe it means letting go of pursuing so much Stuff, letting go of that permanently-elusive fantasy called Purchasing Power, shifting to saner and more sustainable consumption patterns.
Maybe it means finding the courage to acknowledge – loudly and proudly – that we indeed cannot have it all.
Travelling the world. The jet set. The call of the road and the “great American automobile.” Admittedly, those were big dreams, core dreams, hot-button dreams – for each of us as individuals and across America as a whole. But today they’re old, outdated dreams. They’re completely out of touch with the realities of the world we live in.
They’re also the Fools Gold of dreams: They don’t fulfill us. They compound the Hungry Ghost phenomenon, leaving us empty and wanting and depleted and exhausted and never quite there, no matter how hard we’re trying.
I won’t, I won’t, I won’t
Every parent who’s been through the toddler years knows so well that point when the little body goes rigid, the redness wells up in the cheeks, and the ear-shattering scream spews forth: “NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!”
I don’t wanna. I don’t wanna hafta. I won’t unless you make me.
In a way, this is the grand Toddler Tantrum of them all. Mother Earth has said a firm No, and we’re in the midst of a huge-ola, larger-than-life, encompassing-all, societal Toddler Tantrum. 
I’m going to yell and scream and climate-deny and debate your statistics till the cows come home. I’m going to hang on tight to the grow-grow-grow ways because I want it. I want it all and I want it now. I’m going to stomp my tiny little human foot and demand that I have a Right to consume this way, as if I’m bigger than the Earth’s ecosystems or a changing climate. I’m going to try my desperate best to do life the way I’ve always done it, the way I’m familiar with, the way that always before has meant “security.” I’m going to try again and again, and just see if you can stop me, because …
… because …
… (because the new ways confuse me, and I don’t know what to do or how to cope with them. Cuz deep down inside … holy shit, I’m scared. I’m desperately scared. I’m totally freaked-out scared. But I’ll never tell you that, so in this moment my only security is to hang on tight) …
As a parent, we’re coached to hold the tantrumee, to give them a big hug that communicates security. Perhaps in a safe hold, so you don’t get walloped, embracing them with toddler spine to parent’s tummy.
Soft words of confidence, patiently waiting for a break in the storm. Maybe a song. A gentle story.
Perhaps an enticing distraction from that object the tantrumee was so fixated upon. Show them fresh air, a garden, a butterfly. Invite them into a new view of the world.
A toddler is trying to figure out the whole “independence” thing, where once he was part of Mom but now he’s realizing he’s separate and he’s clumsily trying to assert his opinion and see what happens.
Our society is trying to figure out how the whole “independence” thing went sideways, where once we told each other that mankind was separate from and above Nature, and we could take what we wanted and not worry about the rest. We’re seeing what’s happening. And now we’re clumsily grappling with the fact that we’re part of and completely dependent upon these ecosystems, we’ve really messed them up, and we’d better fix them in an awful darn hurry.
More hugs. More stories and song and art. More glimpses of that wonderful new world.
Change is tough, it really is. But to make that change, to make that shift, to really make progress, we’ve got to become the firm parent – to ourselves and to each other – and start saying a firm parental No to the old ways. We’ve got to start saying No to a whole lot more of the conventional things that are still in our lives which no longer serve human survival. We’ve got to find the confidence to let go of the outdated, impossible consumerist dreams.
Only then do we free up the time and the energy to focus on activities which take us toward the new dreams — of a safe, sustainable, socially-just future.
“Another world is not only possible, she is on her way. On a quiet day, I can hear her breathing.” –Arundati Roy
- Read more at Powerdown: Let’s talk about it
Joanne Poyourow directs the Environmental Change-Makers, the group that brought the ideas of the international Transition Movement to Los Angeles. Her latest project provides business guidance to support small, sustainability-oriented businesses and social enterprises.
22 Comments on "Change is coming – Hold on tight"
GregT on Thu, 15th May 2014 3:21 pm
“Change is tough, it really is. But to make that change, to make that shift, to really make progress, we’ve got to become the firm parent – to ourselves and to each other ”
Before change can even be considered, people need to have an understanding that change is necessary. Most people still believe that all is well. Many of those that understand we need to make changes, believe doing even more of what got us into this predicament, is what will get us out of it.
Plantagenet on Thu, 15th May 2014 4:30 pm
All this talk about change is silly. Of course things will change—they always do.
As the Obama administration has demonstrated, its not enough to just have change if change means things getting worse. What we are really after is IMPROVEMENT.
noobtube on Thu, 15th May 2014 4:37 pm
The world cannot handle Amerikkka and will not tolerate them for much longer.
The Earth needs Americuh to disappear.
Too many hold on to the fantasy of ‘Merica, because they don’t want to be responsbile, respectful, or resourceful.
They just want to waste, consume, and destroy. Consequences be DAMNED!
The Earth neither needs that nor can support it much longer.
But, as long as there are ‘Mericans, no place is safe for mankind.
Looks like China wants to be next. That is not going to end well.
MSN fanboy on Thu, 15th May 2014 4:41 pm
noobtube, learn to spell 😀
Fool…
Northwest Resident on Thu, 15th May 2014 4:44 pm
Nice dreamy thoughts in this article, but not practical. Our culture and other cultures aren’t going to change until they absolutely have to. When Darwin’s Law and stark reality put a deathly strangling chokehold on enough people, then we’ll change, but only because we have no choice. Some of us can look far enough ahead to individually start making the needed changes now, but most people can’t see that far ahead. Those are the ones who are going to feel that strangling chokehold the hardest.
Northwest Resident on Thu, 15th May 2014 4:45 pm
noob, are you insane?
GregT on Thu, 15th May 2014 4:49 pm
Things ARE going to get worse Plant. At least from the perspective of modern industrial society. We can either choose to make these changes voluntarily, or wait until they are forced upon us. If we wait, things are going to get even worse.
ghung on Thu, 15th May 2014 5:16 pm
Give it up, Greg. Plant knows what we all want; “IMPROVEMENT”. It’s not like ‘we’ are at the tail end of an era with the highest standards-of-living humanity has ever known, at least by his criteria. It can only get better,, right?
Makati1 on Thu, 15th May 2014 8:21 pm
Been back to the land of denial, and not much has changed. My family and friends still waste and consume like there is plenty and they will always have access to it forever. The roads are disintegrating, more stores are closed up and empty, everything costs much more than on my last visit 20 months ago, and stores still open are starting to show empty shelves.
Change is already happening, but when you are living day to day in the cage, you don’t notice them, I guess. Oh, they complained about the cost of things, but when I asked how much more they cost now than last year, they had no idea, only that things were ‘more expensive’. Denial was obvious everywhere. Too bad, the cliff edge is fast approaching and they seem to have no idea that it is coming.
clueless on Thu, 15th May 2014 9:27 pm
MSN. spelling was deliberate..but all he said was spot on. USA ruined planet earth.
Davy, Hermann, MO on Thu, 15th May 2014 9:46 pm
Mak, the good thing about less is less sh*t from Asia. If the Sh*t from Asia stops then Walmarts will close. Sounds smart to me. I hope we stop importing all the toxic food products soon too. I imagine many Asian glow by now from all the toxic material in the environment they are consuming.
Davy, Hermann, MO on Thu, 15th May 2014 9:47 pm
Clue, China ruined Earth.
GregT on Thu, 15th May 2014 10:01 pm
All,
Human beings are destroying the planet. My race, the whiteys, have done far more of our fair share though, but the rest of us humans are doing their best to catch up.
Dave Thompson on Fri, 16th May 2014 5:35 am
I have been playing the radical hippie as of late by collecting rain water for watering my suburban garden and flushing the toilets. That stuff is heavy lifting. It is hard to stick it to the man and give up on the conveniences of life.
Beery on Fri, 16th May 2014 5:49 am
Incredibly stupid and naive article. The writer seems to think that everyone is just apathetic.
The vast majority of people don’t want change, don’t think it’s coming and will never do anything about it until forced.
Change only comes when it’s in people’s narrow and myopic self-interest to implement the change. That time is AFTER the shit hits the fan.
Davy, Hermann, MO on Fri, 16th May 2014 5:56 am
Dave, before I got my current cabin here at the farm I lived out of an RV. I did this for 2 years while I organized, built, and completed the cabin. In the winter a RV must be winterized due to the insufficient insulation to keep the water lines from freezing. I had to use buckets of water to cook, bathe, flush toilet, wash dishes, and clean with. This act of not having running water inside your shelter changes your understanding of modern. Just imagine no electricity and no FF heating. Life slows down. I personally liked that experience but it sure is nice to have hot water and running water now.
Davy, Hermann, MO on Fri, 16th May 2014 6:05 am
Yea Beer, crisis ultimately makes changes. Comfort leads to apathy. We are in for monumental changes that even we preppers are going to have pause. I live daily in a surreal reflection of how the hell am I going to manage this 400 acre cattle farm without FF. I now understand why there were serfs and slaves. I know understand why Native Americans had their small tribes. It takes big families, tribes and small communities to survive. Lone wolf preppers have a warped understanding of survival. I preach a level one life boat to weather the initial decent to a landing and reboot. Then I preach a level two lifeboat which will involve a community of some kind in alternative living to what we see in BAU. The changes to get from here to there are so much more then it was to get to where we are in status quo BAU to where we were preindustrial man. We may not achieve this return to a lower economic and complexity level with a population so far in overshoot and an ecosystem sterilized and destroyed.
R1verat on Fri, 16th May 2014 6:38 pm
I used to believe that the majority of people (especially my so called ‘friends’ would at least consider the possibility of peak oil, & climate change, then modify their way of life to at least have some kind of plan. I don’t anymore believe anymore. Between zero feedback & no to little change in their lifestyles, I ‘got it’! So I don’t talk about anything related to these subjects with almost all of them now.
I am disappointed in the comments bashing the US as the “conquerers” & source of all evils. Seems there are many that got us to where we are worldwide. We have met the enemy & it is us.
MKohnen on Sat, 17th May 2014 4:04 am
There are many on this site who want to blame others for the current predicament we are in. Some blame other countries, some blame governments, some blame companies. The obvious truth is that they are all right, no doubt about it. Then the second obvious truth: so what?! The blame game perpetuates the myth that if we could only get “them (insert favourite villain here)” to change their ways, everything would be fine. I think that for every one of us, if we want to find someone to blame, well, probably all of us own the most important “blame finder” tool. It’s called a mirror! Again, so what? All we can do now is what we can do, and I don’t think any kind of fix is coming from the institutional level.
peakyeast on Sat, 17th May 2014 5:34 am
I know many people who will consider all who visits this site insane… Noobtube is just a variant.
Davy, Hermann, MO on Sat, 17th May 2014 6:34 am
MK, great point. We are all to blame and no one is to blame. How can you blame someone for being born and raised a certain way? How can you place any blame for a self-organizing system that is above human management. In the world of Nature there is “Is-ness”. In man’s world there is good and evil. Man is dualistic and linear in his thinking. This means you and me thinking and with the guilt and anxiety of good and bad. This is normal human nature. Yet, there is the higher level of spirit we see with man. Here man leaves himself and moves into the sacred which is eternal, nonlinear, and immutable. Here is where we must go facing what we are facing. We will have to choose that higher nature to survive the decent. The problem comes when man moves into that sacred and uses it for self-centered goals.
The problem with our system today at its position is the brittleness and inability to change. All niches have been filled so there is little chance for a manageable change to continue growth. All effort to change lead to consequences and unintended consequences that initiate decent. A system in disequilibrium is set for a bifurcation or break to a lower level of complexity. We are there. If you want to look at this in man’s dualist lenses instead of science and objectivity of nature, then we are at the extreme point of the mechanization of “Evil” or wicked, bad, wrong, immoral, sinful, foul, vile, dishonorable, corrupt, iniquitous, depraved, reprobate, villainous, nefarious, vicious, and malicious. This occurs when a system progresses to a point we are in. In religious terms: “The mechanization of the Devil”. We are in a straight jacket of “wills” where an evil system leads all of us by the very fact of living to destroying us and our world. In the point of view of Nature we are natures hand maiden of extinction and initiating a new evolution. We are Nature’s chaos creating a new cycle of birth. We are Natures 4th horseman of death.
Kenz300 on Sat, 17th May 2014 7:05 am
Overpopulation is the worlds worst environmental problem….. it makes every other problem harder to solve.
Overpopulation facts – the problem no one will discuss: Alexandra Paul at TEDxTopanga – YouTube
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fNxctzyNxC0